A nude woman sitting with her back to us. She has bright brown hair.
Image by mythicson on Pixabay

Getting Nude Again — It’s For My Own Good

This time things are looking good

Kiki Lu Johnson
Published in
8 min readJul 4, 2023


Just like before, I showered in preparation of this intimate experience. This time, I laid a soft blanket in front of the mirror, making sure to apply lotion to certain areas before getting started.

Before that moment, I’d confronted the fear that writing erotica meant my body just wasn’t sexy anymore. Those that can’t do, write, right?

Otherwise, wouldn’t I be having tremendous amounts of sex instead?

Of course that’s not true — my lover finds me incredibly sexy just as I am now. It’s not how attractive I am, but how attractive I feel that limits my sex life. Last time I looked in the mirror trying to see myself that way, to see as he sees. But it didn’t work out. In fact, I think I hated my body even more.

But this time would be different. This time, I had a friend supervising my thoughts, ready to coach me through the minefields.

Through text, y’all. Just two friends texting each other while staring at their naked bodies in the mirror. Nothing weird about that, right?

Just Ten Seconds

The night before, I’d tried to prepare myself mentally by researching old naked women. I used Duck Duck Go, lest my browsing history start…



Kiki Lu Johnson

Mother, erotica/romance writer, and gamer. Loves philosophy, psychology, comedy, and of course- sex!