Sonal Sagore of Gangubai Kathiawadi fame, revvs up for her new play — The Last Audience
Sonal Sagore, a seasoned theatre actor, made her bollywood debut with Gangubai Kathiawadi as one of the kotha girls. She also stars in Duranga Season 2, a much-awaited thriller web-series coming soon on ZEE5. Her new play The Last Audience opens on October 16th at Veda Factory, and we finally sat down to have a chat, which had long been in the works.
What strikes you the moment Sonal enters a room is her unassuming demeanor. At 37, her nimble body language belies her age. Her wide smile when she sees you, bears no trace of the long hours she’s spent rehearsing today, for her upcoming play. Her yellow shirt matches her outlook in life — sunny-with-a-chance-of-happy. For someone who’s been a part of the industry for more than 7 years, her enthusiasm is as fresh as a Subway sandwich.
We meet at a Starbucks on a humid October evening in Mumbai, and as she slides into the chair in front of me, it dawns upon me, that we’re meeting for an interview. It’s nerve-racking at first, but she diffuses the tension by simply chatting for a few minutes, about her new play. And before we begin, she reminds me of our first meeting, which happened to be at the very same Starbucks, last year in August, when I had casually mentioned my wish to interview her. “You manifested it,” she says. I decided to leave the interview in the same hands — destiny.
And as most interviews start, we begin with a question about her childhood.
You hail from a small town in Maharashtra, Chandrapur, the black-gold city of India. What was your childhood like, in terms of the influences that led you to this profession?
“When I was around 5 years old, my mother came to Mumbai, to visit her brother, who lives on Carter Road. When she came back, she told us how she had seen Shah Rukh Khan in a jeep, wearing a white shirt and sunglasses, and how handsome he looked. Before this, I had never seen any of his films, which changed soon after. Another prominent memory is my dancing to Sridevi’s song mere haathon mein nau nau chudiyan when it came. At home, my mom used to play songs on the music player subah uthte hi. While I disliked it at first, I started singing because of that. So there are many small influences, which have shaped my journey. And I just had this dream of being with SRK one day!” she says gleefully.
The innocence of that 5-year-old Sonal isn’t lost on her, in the way it has kept her going towards her dream, one step at a time. Her engineering background and her long stint in IT ended fairly recently, in 2017, when she decided to pursue her childhood dream. “It all began with an acting workshop I took in 2012,” she says. “Since I was working in Pune, and I was passionate about acting, my husband and I decided to form a theatre group — Pushkar Rangmanch, with fellow like-minded people and used to perform plays over the weekends.”
But how did you juggle an IT job and theatre for over 3 years?
“To be honest, I never looked at it like ‘juggling’, because mujhe itna maza aa raha tha, that we used to look forward to the weekends, ki kab kaam khatam kar ke, we will get to do the thing we enjoy the most. When you love something, you’ll get up at 4 a.m. to do it.” I ask her if she would like some coffee, which she politely declines (Ah, these actors, I tell you). I get myself a cappuccino, eager to know more about her journey.
And what made you finally leave your IT job?
“I had just gotten transferred to Mumbai, and machine learning had just become the hot new thing in IT. I found it very hard at first. My husband one day said “Chodd de Sonal job. You anyway are in Mumbai now. I will also take a transfer to Mumbai, and you can devote your time fully to acting.” But soon, machine learning became easier. You see, things only stay hard till you don’t know them. I often worried about how I’ll manage our finances, if I quit the job…but then, after four long months of thinking and thinking, one day I simply left it.”
Her philosophy of taking courageous leaps despite not being sure of the future continues to be a big propellant for her to date.
Before Gangubai Kathiawadi happened, you’ve had a long relationship with theatre. What was that journey like?
“Acting seekhni hoti hai is something I learnt from theatre. There are so many things that theatre teaches you, from vocal exercises to working on your body, which not only means going to the gym but working on your body language, to make it lithe and flexible to live characters ranging from an old woman to a wrestler, to a 20-year-old girl. Theatre mein ek itminaan hai, which gives you ample space to bring a character that’s merely on paper to life. Character ko jeeta jaagta banana is what theatre has given me.” You can see her love for theatre in her eyes, that light up, as she speaks, making you believe every word she says.
At one point in our conversation, we arrive at an interesting question, about how she balances the actor in her with the audience in her, while watching other people’s work. She says “An actor needs to be very sharp. Usse jhaankna aana chahiye. Even right now, while I’m talking to you, main aapko jhaank rahi hoon. It’s not just while I’m watching a movie or a play, but this is how I interact with anyone.” Seeing me still fishing for more, she states it in a matter-of-fact tone “Itna complicated nahi hai yeh. People speak in jargon like switch-on, switch-off, but honestly, you cannot separate the actor from the person. This duality exists in everyone, even you. When you saw me, you complimented me on my shirt, and only later you stated that you also love this colour. Pehle aap jhaank rahi thi. It’s actually very easy!” I nod in agreement.
“An actor needs to be very sharp. Usse jhaankna aana chahiye. Even right now, while I’m talking to you, main aapko jhaank rahi hoon. It’s not just while I’m watching a movie or a play, but this is how I interact with anyone.”
How has your theatre experience enriched you personally?
“Aaah…very good question. So pehle kya hota tha na, suppose if my friend has told me something bad about someone, I would agree with her blindly, without hearing the other side of the story. Theatre has taught me how to analyse situations as a whole. Sunna maine theatre se seekha hai. And it’s not just about listening only when someone is speaking. Agar koi chupp hai, aap usse bhi sunn sakte hain. If someone is feeling uncomfortable and is unable to speak, by simply offering them a glass of water, you have listened to them. Or by just keeping your hand on their hand, you are listening to them. Khud ko shut naa rakhna, I have learnt from theatre.” I remembered our first meeting when she had made a stranger like me feel seen, by simply talking to me for 10 minutes at length.
In the middle of our interview, two theatre actors come to our table to tell us about a play they’re doing, and Sonal’s warm nature shines through when she pauses to talk to them for a few minutes, earnestly inquiring about their play.
How did this theatre experience give you an edge while working on projects like Gangubai Kathiawadi and your upcoming web series Duranga season 2?
“Since you’re constantly rehearsing for plays, I gained a lot of confidence from doing theatre. It made following my directors’ instructions easier, because we were exposed to different acting methods, from Stanislavski to the Navrasa. Also, I gained a lot of patience, thanks to theatre.” She played one of the kotha girls, Banno, in Gangubai, and only on my second viewing, fairly recently, did I notice how fearlessly she portrayed her character. Even though she’s a ProSpeck of Cinema, she’s also a star performer.
As we go through life, so many random dots connect for one to reach where they are in life. For Sonal too, her stint at Yash Raj Films as a Casting Assistant was one of the many dots, which she says helped her greatly while auditioning for roles, especially with Sanjay Leela Bhansali for Gangubai, given how her work at YRF demanded her to give cues to other actors.
You are 37 right now. Does the fact that you started late in your career ever cross your mind?
“Age society ka ek dhaancha hai, jiske andar aapko iss samay shaadi karni hai, iss samay bachche karne hain, blah blah. I wanted to be an actor since I was a kid, but I acted on it when I was 27. If I had gotten proper guidance, I would have started earlier and my journey would have been different. So, when people say arre ab toh late ho gaye, late kabhi nahi hote, hum bas act karne se darte rehte hain. Our mind always stops us I feel. One needs to remove the noise.”
How do you do that? It’s much harder than you make it sound. She says “Till last year I was struggling with it, because my films and web series were not coming out. Then I just realised and accepted that it’s simply not in my hands. Gangubai took 3 years to release, because of COVID. Giving auditions, and working on my character and craft once I land them, that’s all there is in my control. So I like to enjoy the process now. And anyway, the result makes you happy only for a brief moment. Why should I mess up my mental health over such a transient feeling of happiness? I focus on practising happiness instead.” You mean happiness is an active practice? She says “Of course!”
What are some books that have shaped your view of the world, or have impacted you deeply?
“The Outsider by Albert Camus is one book that has shaped my thinking greatly. It’s about a man who doesn’t follow the social norms, and how even after losing his mother, he resumes his work shortly, which isn’t the normal grieving pattern. People misunderstand him because of his unusual philosophy, but he believes that if he’s feeling the pain in his heart, he doesn’t have to show it. Logon ko aaj kal sab kuch aasan chahiye. Unko jab tak dikhega nahi, samjhega nahi. If someone is sitting and laughing, it doesn’t mean they aren’t grieving. Toh dikhawa naa karna maine iss book se seekha hai. Main dukhi hoon, mujhe dikhane ki zaroorat nahi. Main khush hoon, par mujhe dikhane ki zaroorat nahi hai. We are living in times where everyone is burdened by the need to show their emotions.”
And what about a film that you keep going back to, no matter how many times you’ve seen it before?
“It has to be Kung Fu Panda. Present is a gift isn’t just a line, it’s a huge statement the film makes. It makes me happy every time I watch it, that how he’s so happy with his faults. Khush hai woh jaisa bhi hai.”
Along with a professional journey in this field, Sonal is also on a personal journey of self-acceptance, and learning to let go of things, stuff we sometimes forget to focus on when we’re in a rush to get somewhere. While constantly working on her craft, she’s also working on herself. After all, we’re all a work-in-progress, aren’t we?
At this point, Sonal takes a loo break, and I decide to take a break from the heavy existential questions and ask her some light questions from my cue cards.
Do you ever get star-struck? Who is your favourite actor/actress of all time?
“I get work-struck. To be star-struck, you need to know their work and like it. I wanted to meet Irrfan Khan sir once, but now, I get star-struck just by his interviews. I don’t need to see an actor physically to be star-struck. I don’t need a physical form to admire someone.”
Bombay is the city of dreams. What’s your favourite thing about it?
“I used to love Bombay for its freedom earlier. Now I love it because of its inclusivity. I live in Versova so I’ll talk about this area. Yahan high rise aur slums dono ek saath exist karte hain. If I go to my native town, people will not be comfortable living next to a jhopad patti. They will look down upon it, in a way that’s class-conscious. I don’t like that thought process. They say wahan stink hai, I feel stink aapke dimaag mein hai.” We talk about how there’s no place that doesn’t stink in this city, and laugh over it in mutual agreement. “And yet, I love this city. Log bolte hain chhote ghar hain. Haan hain, lekin dreams toh bade hain na.” I ask her her favourite place to eat in the city, and she says “Actually, Mumbai ka khana Mumbai mein milta hi nahi hai. Ghar ka khana best hai, baki sab theek hai.” We crack up, and talk about her love for sattu ka paratha and a good plate of pani puri.
But these days she’s watching what she eats, as she has a new play coming up, The Last Audience at Veda Factory, which opens on the 16th of October.
You have an upcoming play The Last Audience. Tell us a little bit about it.
“The play is about a complicated mother-daughter relationship, where a mother’s self-involved and controlling nature leads her daughter to commit suicide. It deals with questions like can you ever escape the guilt of doing something wrong by someone? Can having a last audience, someone who can listen to you, make you take different choices in life? How important is it for people to be seen and heard in a relationship? And lastly, can we ever escape our own mind?”
Besides it being directed by Rahul Patil, your husband, what got you excited about this play?
“His hard work, and the beautiful script he’s written. Every time I read it, I interpret it differently. It has those layers.”
For someone living in Mumbai for many years on their own, trying to make it in this industry which is known for being tough for outsiders, one wonders how they do it, and what keeps them going.
How much does family support matter when it comes to chasing your dreams?
“Earlier I used to think that family support meant that your parents support you financially or should tell you that you’re doing good. But now, when my parents don’t tell me you’re doing the right thing, naa kehte hue bhi woh mujhe support kar rahe hain, because they’re not stopping me.” She talks about practising happiness on her own, and not being a parasite to others. I ask her what she means by ‘parasite’, and she says “I don’t want to do something with the thought that this will make my parents happy. By doing this, I am burdening them with something which I should have done for my own sake. Maybe they are not even asking me to do this, but simply because I am afraid to take the onus of my choices on myself, I make a weak choice.”
“I don’t want to do something with the thought that this will make my parents happy. By doing this, I am burdening them with something which I should have done for my own sake. Maybe they are not even asking me to do this, but simply because I am afraid to take the onus of my choices on myself, I make a weak choice.”
This is a brave way of looking at things, and upon asking the foundation behind this mindset, she says “Main apne aap se khush hoon. I have faults, I am happy with them. I have good qualities, usse bhi khush hoon. I know I can be rude, or upfront sometimes, or that I will have negative thoughts about people at times, but I am happily living these Navrasas. If I don’t feel jealous, how will I portray that emotion on screen? Toh mujhe har cheez jeeni hai. Aur khud se khush rehti hoon, it’s a practice. And I keep myself mentally fine…simply by knowing that not everything is in my hands.”
I look at my phone, and it’s past 10 pm, realising only now, that this conversation has been going non-stop for more than 2 hours. Having gotten enough, I decide to ask her a few parting questions, before calling it a night.
What is one advice you’d like to share with aspiring actors, who look up to those who’ve made it?
“If you have dreams of becoming an actor, it’s a great dream firstly. I just believe that an actor has to make acting their lifelong partner and build a personal relationship with it. Because nothing happens overnight. You have to invest time in this relationship. And read books.” I ask her what people who don’t like reading can do. She says “Then read people. As actors, we must be vulnerable so that life can teach us by giving us new experiences. If you keep your guard up all the time, you cannot have new experiences in life.”
How do you pick yourself up after a rejection?
“Soti hoon, acha khana khati hoon, jo karne ka mann hota hai karti hoon. I watch movies, hang out with friends, cry, and do everything I feel like, aur phir se acting pe lagg jaati hoon. Mera rona, sona, khana helps me. Jee bhar ke ro, aadha adhura nahi karna chahaiye kuch bhi.”
I think that’s a great way to end this interview because we spoke jee bhar ke.
As Sonal gets ready to leave, I see in her a woman who is fearlessly chasing her dreams, yet easy on herself enough to know what matters to her in life. The fact that this conversation has many personal takeaways for me, makes her someone I’ll always be interested in, no matter what film she signs next.
To book your tickets to The Last Audience, click on the link below.
https://bit.ly/3ZVOzNh
