Magic: The Gathering
Magical Thinking: Scars of Mirrodin
Welcome back to Magical Thinking, a look at the cards and art of Magic: the Gathering, set by set, from the beginning, through the eyes of a casual fan. Today we are starting a brand new block with the titular set: October 2010's Scars of Mirrodin.
You remember Mirrodin, right? It was the first plane after Dominaria that got an extensive looking at, the artifact-themed plane created by Karn and then populated by a Phyrexian oil-possessed Memnarch. It was also one of the most busted blocks in Magic history. Thank goodness that wont happen again, right? Right?
Anyway, it’s now much later. Remember that Phyrexian oil? Well, it’s kind of gotten bigger. In fact it’s begun converting Mirrodin into a new Phyrexia. Luckily there are planeswalkers on hand to fight against this corruption: Elspeth (Remember her from Alara?) Venser (A new guy from Urborg), and home-grown hero Koth the Hammer are present to help stem the tide of corruption (Also Tezzeret is there I guess, but he’s not gonna help because he’s an A-hole). Surely this dream team of mighty planeswalkers will help keep Mirrodin safe. Right? RIGHT?
Anyway, onto the cards.
Naughty Phyrexians will go in the time-out corner to think about what they’ve done. Also, apparently they tied this guy up with glow-in-the-dark bubble-tape. Six feet of gum for you, not Phyrexians!
Elspeth is looking really good here. So serene and focused. Which is good because this fight is personal for her (remember she was originally a Phyrexian slave). I kind of feel sorry for Elspeth, she never seems to find a place she can belong.
Metalcraft is one of the new keywords introduced in this set. Metalcraft does a thing as long as you control three or more artifacts, and is exclusive to the Mirran faction (As indicated by the donut in the background). See the native Mirran’s know artifacts, and know about them. With that kind of power, the Phyrexian’s don’t stand a chance (He says, knowing how this ends).
Where do little baby Myr come from? Well, you see, when an artificer and a artifact love each other very much, and their player spends one colorless mana…um…ask your mom.
As someone who plays DnD, I can’t tell you how important winning initiative is. That’s the difference between an exciting boss fight and a two round mop up.
FALCON PAAAAAWNCH! I mean come on, it was either that or a Linkara “I AM A MAN” joke.
I already talked about how cool the Alara sphinx are. There’s no way I’m not mentioning the Mirrodin sphinx. Look at that beauty. It’s a big metal kitty and I love them.
And here we have our first Phyrexian faction creature, as indicated by the Phyrexian symbol in the background. Spoiler warning: that symbol is going to be the bane of your existence.
Hey, it’s the Vedalken. Always a pleasure to see them. It looks like they have improved since they stopped following Memnarch. They still got four arms, but they aren’t all wrinkly and sealed in those diver helmets.
It occurs to me this is pretty much the equivalent of the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man from Ghostbusters in a “choose the form of your destructor” way. Tell me I’m wrong.
And this is like the trash compacter monster from Star Wars. It’s in the same spirit at least.
I think that’s the GOP’s stance on evidence of climate change (With the same end result).
Also, another new keyword: Proliferate, which increases all your counters. This will show up again in War of the Spark, which I got to play when I was playing Magic on Arena so I am somewhat familiar with this mechanic.
Honestly I just picked this card because I wanted to look at more Vedalken. I just think they’re neat.
And here we have another new mechanic: Infect. This is the Phyrexian faction power. It lets them wear down creatures with -1/-1 counters, and take down players with poison counters (Which, remember, kill you if you have 10 or more). It’s a pretty nasty ability, but I’m sure that the Mirrans can win eventually. Maybe… don’t quote me.
I think I got to play with this card on Arena during the Jumpstart event, which they should have just kept doing. Hopefully we get another Jumpstart-like set eventually.
Hey, it’s Geth! You remember him? He was from the original Mirrodin block, and now he’s back, on team Phyrexia, to the surprise of absolutely no one.
It’s a Skeksis! HMMMMMM.
Also, you may be wondering what a Praetor is. Oh ho ho, we’ll be getting to that.
That scythe looks horribly unbalanced. I think those are usually two-handed weapons. I posted this guy because I think he’s like one of a handful of Mirran-allied Black cards. I usually champion the “dark is not evil” aspects of Black, but they fell to Phyrexia super fast. It’s not a good look.
Think I’m starting to get why the Moriok went Phyrexian so fast.
Wait a minute. How do they still have flying when they don’t have any wings? Is that green stuff coming out the back like jet propulsion? I feel like I should call a Flight of Dragons on this guy or something.
WE’RE NOT CAVEMEN! We have TECHNOLOGY. *Throws computer at Phyrexians*
That’s pretty much my brain when I’m gearing up to DM.
The goblins of Mirrodin have changed a bit since last time we saw them. Also, I admire the mouth width on that bad boy.
Here we have our new local planeswalker. Koth is big, strong, and made partially out of molten rock. I’m sure he’s gonna have a long and interesting career as a planeswalker and not get stuck in a hopeless battle against an entire plane. *eyes shift nervously*
When I played WoW, some of my favorite quests involved goblins and all the shenanigans they got up to. I think this catches the essence of a WoW goblin very well, if only for a second.
Another artifact-centered set, another version of Shatter. It’s always fun trying to guess what is getting shattered. This time… it looks like some kind of helmet? I was gonna say the Mindslaver but I don’t think it’s that.
Man, Enter the Spider-verse would have been a weird movie if we had gotten the Mirran Spider-Man. Also much shorter.
Kind of surprised to see a Green Phyrexian creature this early, especially since White managed to keep from getting infected thus far. Still, that’s a pretty nasty looking Phyrexian. What’s wrong with its head?
Angry tooting intensifies. The revenge of the high school marching band.
I think claims of improvement may vary. That thing looks like it’s ready to just fall over and melt into black goo. But then that’s Phyrexia in a nutshell.
Hey, it’s the Mirrodin equivalent of Omnath. And he’s bringing a load of friends. Hopefully he has as much luck as Omnath has.
Man there are a lot more Green Phyrexian things than I expected. What’s going on, Green Mirrodin? I expect more from you.
Congratulations, you win the award for being the least ugliest Phyrexian. You did it, buddy.
Here we have Venser, another planeswalker who appears in this set. I’m pretty sure he dies at the end, sacrificing himself to save…well, we’ll get to that later.
See, if Daedalus had just made those wings out of metal it would have been fine.
Also, like Mirrodin before, there are a lot of artifacts incoming, so strap in.
Imprint is back, and like all good mechanics they are doing something interesting with it. I like the flavor here, where the shell is incubating a clone. And if you didn’t get a creature card? Well I guess the clone didn’t come out right.
Perhaps the Phyrexian’s greatest crime: They brought vaping to Mirrodin.
Ah darksteel, the originator of the indestructible mechanic. Now in convenient myr form.
One thing I always love are artifacts and enchantments who become creatures when you do a thing. Those are always fun to see.
Come down to Mirran Resistance Customs! We’ll modify any artifact creature for under 29.99. We work on myrs, juggernauts, masticores, Esperites, you name it, we will improve it! Come on down today!
This combines all the things I love about Magic artifacts. It’s a mill effect, it’s a big weird complicated machine, and it’s a clock that can destroy the world. What’s not to love?
Apparently Apple works for the Phyrexians. I always suspected but still…
Elesh Norn? Who is that, I wonder? We’ll find out soon enough.
Also, looks like that guy is wearing the latest version of the Jacuzzi suit from the Simpsons.
Nuke it from orbit might be overkill in most places, but against Phyrexians I say blast away. Exterminatus and all that.
Don’t mess with myr, they will climb up into a big ball and just roll you over like it’s a certain famous PS2 game. Am I talking about Katamari or Symphony of the Night? That’s up to you to decide. There are no wrong answers!
I was expecting this to be Phyrexian faction, but nope, it’s Mirran. I guess this explains why the Mirran eventually lose if they have to deal with two factions turning everyone into zombies (uh oh SPOILER WARNING. I’m sorry I gave away the ending of the ten year old Magic set).
Centipede should not have teeth. Bad centipede. You go to centipede jail right now!
This is basically the robot equivalent of a Left 4 Dead boomer. Including being a little bit chunky. It’s okay, buddy. No body shaming here.
Part of the reason I pick certain cards for these articles is to get a better look at their art. Like this one. From the small version those golems looked like a mountain range. It’s hard to tell due to perspective, but they may actually be mountain sized.
Wait, what is the robot equivalent of Lyme disease?
Soliton sounds like the name of a Transformer character. Considering this is Mirrodin, that seems appropriate.
The weapon you want at your side when you mind and body are one. Perfect for storming David Lo-Pan’s hideout.
Fun Tarot card fact: the tower is a symbol of impending disaster and ruin. I’m sure that doesn’t mean anything here though.
Still kind of surprised that Green has fallen so quickly to the Phyrexians. Were is Glissa, the hero of the last Mirrodin block, during all of this?
Spellbook mechanics are always fun. After all, reading opens up whole new worlds, as well as giving you an unlimited hand size so you can better blow those worlds to pieces.
One thing you got to give to the Phyrexians, they are good at making big scary artifact creatures. Especially ones that break into smaller components when killed.
Oh hey, another locus. Counting the one from Mirrodin block, that brings it up to two. Are more loci on the way?
And that concludes our look at Scars of Mirrodin. It sure is looking exciting, isn’t it? What will happen next? Who are the Praetors? How long will I keep up this running joke of feigning ignorance of a ten year old card game plot? Find out next time with Mirrodin Besieged. Until then, stay Magical.
