Comedy

I’m Going to Be a Clown

When I told my sister’s husband that I needed to get back in time for my clowning class, he started laughing. My sister said, “Cory, stop it!” And he said, “Why? It’s clowning!”

I guess he was right. The class was working and I hadn’t even done anything.

#17: How to Avoid Doing Things

Doing things is much harder than not doing them. Here’s how to avoid the latter:

• Lay out a careful plan for what you want to do.
• Break it down into steps.
• Identify when and where you take those…

Tip #11: Underwear Matures at Two Years

New underwear is uncomfortable, especially the kind that comes in a bag.

This is because manufacturers pick the underwear early and then faux-ripen it under UV lighting before stuffing it in plastic and sending it to your local big-box…

Tip #10: Grind Your Own Coffee Beans

In the past three months I’ve moved cities, changed jobs, picked up new hobbies and lovers, and started wearing more robes.

I’ve also started to grind my own coffee beans.

Tip #8: Stop fooling yourself, dummy! We all know you’re a freak.

Tip #7: People Don’t Care About You or Your Haircut