She will leave you all behind…
On a cold Friday morning in the year 1997 when I was just about 10 years old, my mother asked me & my sister to go for the parent teacher meeting alone.
She handed over a note to me & asked me to show it to my teacher.
My father was a little unwell and mom had to stay home with him. For the first time me & my sister went alone to school on a meeting day.
I used to live in Shimla which had winter almost throughout the year. And no matter how beautiful, cold always adds more to your sorrow. And when you’re just about 10, anything sad around the house is the worst thing ever.
So dad was unwell & it felt like the end of the world to me. We used to not watch TV, we used to not talk loudly around the house. I thought if we continue to do regular things he will get disturbed and won’t get better soon.
He was better in about 3–4 weeks and things were back to normal but those weeks left a mark on me which I will never forget.
So back to that Friday when my sister & I walked all the way to school with a note in hand.
We stood in a line for 15 minutes and walked into my classroom. My class teacher was angry looking at me walking alone. She probably thought I was wasting her time.
Firstly, I had scored Cs & Ds in my unit tests and then I recklessly walked in.
I handed over the note to her & told her; “My father has high blood pressure and he is on bed rest. So my parents can’t come this time,”
She instantly felt sorry for being so rude to me.
I had done very badly in my unit tests. I was not a class star, but I was above average. This time the Cs & Ds clearly put me at the bottom & my Miss was not impressed.
I had not studied and my marks looked like; 9/25, 11/25, 5/25, 13/25.
Mum & dad did not scold me for that. They knew I was sad and distracted. They told me its alright & I can do better. And that “I know how to do it”. They did not tell me what to do.
But this was enough.
…
Last two months I studied. I won’t say I studied really hard. I followed my usual drill.
I gave my last unit tests before the finals.
It was that time again when my teacher announced marks for each one of us.
And I knew she was going to make me stand with the other non-performers (like last time) and tell them how pathetic my scores were.
So she did.
She called out 9 names and then she called out my name.
She asked me to come & stand next to her desk & wait.
I imagined her throwing the report card on my face, or asking me to face the wall and stand or just anything humiliating. My face turned red.
She started by announcing how unhappy she was with the other girls who were standing. They were all in the D category according to her.
Then she looked at me, pointed my report card towards me and told the entire class.
“She is going to leave you all behind.”
23/25, 24/25, 25/25 ,22/25
I came back up to A, A+ & B+ & I was just excited to go home and tell my parents. I did not believe myself.
…
To this day, after 21 years, every time I feel pathetic about myself, I just tell myself; “She will leave you all behind.”
And I do whatever it is I have to.
Find that one moment that motivated you, and don’t ever lose it. It is meant to be used again and again and again.
I am successful, I am happy & I’m going to continue feeling this because I know I can & that’s why I will.
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