26 letters

M —

How could it be anyone other than you? Replays of your everyday witty banter live on in my brain, just like the euphoria of listening to you play guitar while singing lives in my soul. Never leave!!! It’s lonely here without you.

K —

Maman,

Merci beaucoup pour tout. I am thinking about our train ride from Nice back to Paris, which we spent coloring for hours and speaking a lot less than normal. You fell in love with Niki de Saint Phalle, and your work was a message to “embrace the fat!” I am lucky to know you, with your…

J —

It took three months to get you to like me. Stranger danger and “don’t judge me, I don’t judge you.” Though I think you were judging me, for thinking I was judging you? No matter, you are my partner in chocolate-pie-eating crime. You are eternally my lady of Paris, my sophisticated monster who collects old newspapers…

I —

You can do this, you know.

It requires you to sit still more than you care for, it requires you to plan, and be ready for that plan to fall apart. But, you speak of inspiration as if it is your electricity, it is El Dorado and you’ve found a map, it is as tangible as the wind — in this, you’ll…

H —

Love hath no reason as the devotion of a younger sibling
~quote me!

I have been following you around since before I can remember. They say I was in a crib, trying to break out just to be in the same room as you. Remember when you had a slight speech impediment when we were kids? The only…

G —

You were constantly trying to improve, to be better, though sometimes I wondered if enough would ever be enough.

One crisp orange sunset, the daily Florida showers had soaked the firewood in your backyard and you were disappointed, sweating from cooking all afternoon and cranky that the weather…

F —

Everything that is tiny and cute reminds me of you. Miniature books, toys, and especially little plants that look like they just might fit in that thimble-sized ceramic pot that we had on our kitchen windowsill.

I think the color of your soul is light blue, and when I’m having a particularly…

E —

I wanted to say thank you for the sound of your voice on a particularly meaningful phone call which I remember taking just outside the Powell BART station some sunny cloudy January day.

I didn’t know many people in San Francisco, and when you called me to empathize with my apartment search, it…

D —

It is almost as though when I sit next to you, my batteries tap into a secret supply of solar power that somehow lets me shine a bit brighter.

I create, want to build, try and fail whenever you’re around, because it’s just who you are. We could sit in Golden Gate Park, the Tiergarten and all…