Racism Doesn’t Really Exist

I would know. I wore a turban and had a beard for the majority of my life.

Racism today is mostly created where it doesn’t necessarily exist. And if we stop creating it, well, it WILL go away.

As complex as the issue may seem. I want to shed a different light on it.

It took me several years, and a great deal of introspection to come to this realisation. I’m hoping today I can get you there within a few minutes. And we can all stop (or at least alleviate) this pain.

Racism is such a touchy topic to discuss.

The word on its own sparks so much tension. When it really shouldn’t.

I’ve hesitated from publishing this post for weeks and weeks now because for some reason if you’re talking about racism in any which way, you feel like you’re walking on eggshells.

But as someone who was a prime candidate for conventional “racism”, it is important that I bite the bullet here to present a first-hand perspective and a unique attitude to this problem.

One definition first — what is Racism?…

Racism is the marginalisation of an individual based on their race. In other words, it is a belief that members of a particular race are superior to another.

I am Sikh in religion — and hence for a majority of my life I wore a turban and had a long beard

(a cornerstone of our religion is to not cut your hair)

So if anyone was a likely candidate to be on the receiving end of racist remarks, I fit the stereotype down pat.

Sikh Male — credit Pen Tacular Artist (Raj U.K.)

Wearing a turban and sporting a beard today is like carrying a sign saying “Hey, racist remarks over here please.” Back then it was an even more odd sight in a country like Australia — it was very unusual to see a person wearing a turban.

Even though I may have stood out like a sore thumb and even though there was little education around Sikhs, NOT ONCE did I encounter “racism”.

NEVER.

This was through:

1. 9 years of schooling (where I was the only kid who wore a turban in the entire school),
2. 5.5 years of university (again one of the only few who wore a turban), and,
3. A couple of years of professional cubicle-monkey Engineering work.

Not once.

ZILCH.

I no longer wear a turban or keep a long beard, but I only realised recently why I didn’t encounter racism through all the years that I did.

It had nothing to do with what other people said. It wasn’t that I was lucky I only crossed paths with those people that weren’t making racism comments.

It was, in fact, my perception of racism.

A short story here to explain this. My “Aha” moment…

I was with a group of friends (everyone in this group was brown — Indian). We were sitting at a bar having a drink, and wanted something to eat, so we signalled the waiter.

An older white male in his 50s, poorly groomed, messy hair, with a fluffy beard, walked up and said:

“Sorry gents our kitchen is closed.”

We wanted to eat. So a few of us went to McDonalds next door and brought back food based on everyone’s order.

Noticing this, the waiter came striding towards our table, and said:

“Please take the food outside you can’t eat stuff here that isn’t from our kitchen.”

We were still ordering drinks at this time, so it wasn’t as if we were just using the venue to eat third-party food.

We insisted. We persevered.

We pointed out again, just incase he had forgotten, that the kitchen was closed, and we were paying for drinks…

…why does it matter?

The man was firm and said the food must be taken out. It’s policy.

Rude comments were dished out at him from our group.

(a few drinks can do that)

Through a process of escalation, skip to the punch line, the waiter then said something along the lines of:

“Look, maybe the curry house allows you to bring in Maccas, we don’t. So try them.”

And he walked away.

Unbeknownst to me why, but everyone in our group got tremendously fired up.

Apparently what had been said was the height of racism and a lot of hurrah ensued thereafter.

PAUSE.

It was at this moment of reflection, I realised the problem.

There are always two sides to every tale, the:

1. Racist side
2. All the other possibilities side

Pretty much everything can be seen either way.

In this bar instance,

1. Everyone saw the use of the phrase “curry house” as a surefire sign that the man was a bigot. And he needed to be put in his place and so on.
2. I, meanwhile, felt the waiter was ticked off by our behaviour, and hence rudely told us to go to an Indian restaurant…because we’re Indian.

There is no clear answer as to whether this situation is “racist” or not. And usually there never is.

But what IF, instead of race,

There was a table of overweight people and one of those that weren’t. Both tables had brought external food into the bar. And the waiter told the table full of overweight people to leave, not the other.

Is there really a difference?

Yes, there is.

The difference is we add a specific label to one incident. The other we let fall into the broad category of “rude”.

And the label is what causes the race divide to stretch further.

If we perceive something as racist, it is at that point racism starts.

You can’t expect to change someone else’s worldview, but you have complete control over your own.

So when you make the choice to label a thing as “racist”, well then it is.

This isn’t to undermine the pain racially motivated hate can cause, it isn’t to undermine the oppression people have faced and are still facing, and it isn’t to test a person’s resilience compared to another.

It is to indicate there is another way to perceive and respond to the entire issue.

I started to scroll back to older memories where I had felt bullied or teased.

• In primary school, I walked into the guys toilet and all the guys starting yelling “Omg you’re a girl, what are you doing in here?” — I could have perceived that as racism.
• I was given the name “Papadum” for the last two years of my primary school education in Melbourne. I jokingly gave the guy the nickname “Hamburger” in return— I could have perceived that as racism.
• I was bullied by an older student who used to knock my turban while walking past me during my school years. I pushed him back in return — I could have perceived that as racism.
• Following the heat of the 9/11 attacks, I was called Osama at a nightclub. I jested to the guy to be careful because I could get him killed — I could have perceived that as racism.

I am not taking higher ground trying to be Dalai Lama here.

Maybe I was naive, maybe I was stupid, maybe I should have been more vigilant. But regardless I am still here, I haven’t walked out mentally scarred or injured, I have never felt discriminated against and have never faced “racism”. Even though I may have encountered a lot of rude comments.

I just perceived a person’s ignorance to my race as them having a lack of knowledge. Like I would if someone couldn’t solve 2 multiplied by 2.

Or they were just generally a**holes and better off avoided.

However, a black friend of mine said the below to me recently:

• “I got on a train and sat next to this white lady, who moved away as soon as I sat down. People here are so *insert profanity* racist.”

It isn’t hard to spot racism if you’re out looking for it.

The lady could have been getting ready for her next stop? She could have got tired and decided to get up? She may have wanted to see a nearby landmark?

(All the other possibilities side)

…Or yes you could stick the “racist” label on her.

(The racist side)

My friend, in that scenario, chose to invent racism.

The simple fact of the matter is —

The sender:

As people are still acknowledging racism, racism is still around today. If you perceive a man, not as an Indian man, or a black man, or an aboriginal man, but as a man — then your views of that man would be free of any prejudice.

The receiver:

If you view comments, actions, and behaviours of people free of the heated label of racism — then they are just that. Comments, actions and behaviours. Freedom begins.

The only thing we can control from the above is as the receiver. And by doing so, we make it more likely the sender’s view changes too.

We need to realise people will always find a reason to discriminate.

To get a leg up wherever they can. To do hate-filled hurtful things. To give opportunities to a person of one look above another. It is naive to think that force and fear driven media can stop it. It can’t.

BUT,

This doesn’t mean we sit around and let people discriminate.

This doesn’t mean we stop educating people.

This doesn’t mean we don’t actively promote equality.

This doesn’t mean we ignore and turn our backs on the horrific acts of the past.

It does mean, though, that we change our viewpoint and tackle the issue with a different attitude.

It does mean that we recalibrate the label maker we use each day.

We set it such that it can no longer print out the label “racist”.

Because once we stop attaching this label to things that happen, how can it still continue to exist?

Edit: FAQ: 02/03/2016 — Maybe I haven’t been as clear as I should have. As an example, let’s say Amy who is Muslim and wears a headscarf to school has an incident where several guys gather around her, tease, laugh at her, and physically bully her for the way she looks, making her feel insignificant. If she adds the label “racist” to this incident, at that moment she has extended that gap between herself and the race the guys are, and has made it more painful for herself. However if instead the guys are grouped in the general group of “a**holes”, there is no divide based on race, and it is easier to deal with. The label itself is the separator. Thereafter, Amy can report the incident to be actioned so it doesn’t happen again (and the powers will assist her in doing so), and she can also pursue whichever path she chooses to further educate others on her religion and race if she chooses to do so. I really don’t see force being a better way to transform the issue.

Co-Founder: K2AV & Founder: Sixth Degree. I’m developing a product that will make it easier to catch-up face to face with those that matter. Helping create experiences that’ll last forever, unlike social media. Release mid-2016.

My story in 5 lines —

Studied to become an Engineer (did a 5.5 year double degree), but instead quit to start a record label, write a movie script, and tour the world as an MC and performer. With little savings left, co-founded now the largest AV provider to education in WA — growing it 100% year on year. Working on our next venture with aspirations to help people connect face to face in a way social media can’t.

If this story had any positive impact on you — please click “Recommend” so others can also see it.

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