The first steps are the hardest, be supportive! — 10 of 31
Or “Encouraging Now Year’s Resolutions since 1984.”
I’m a patron of Ninja Writers and this is day ten of the May Medium Post-a-Day Challenge of blogging for 30 consecutive days.
I hate New Year’s Resolutions. Oh, don’t get me wrong. I love self-improvement and helping others. And I’m not some jaded resolutioner myself. I just dislike the arbitrary timeline that people set for themselves that ultimately freaks them out and makes them feel like a failure when it doesn’t happen in the allotted time. It’s mostly that I’m a firm believer that ANYTIME is the perfect time to better yourself.
Nevertheless, the start of a journey can be daunting and let’s face it, starting typically is the toughest part to our big goals.
Hell, this very writing challenge seemed crazy right before I started. I remember thinking the Sunday before our first post:
“How in the ever loving Hell am I going to find thirty things to write about without sounding like a noob, a moron, or both? A morb?”
Heh. Morb.
Then I recalled the best piece of advice from “If You Want to Write” by Brenda Ueland (originally published in 1938, but timeless, in my opinion). You don’t force creativity. You open yourself to the universe (edit is mine, she uses Christian spirituality here) and let inspiration come to you.
I haven’t been sitting at my desk and crumbling “bad ideas” on paper and throwing them (and missing) at my garbage bin daily (even in the figurative sense).
Truth is, this crap is just coming to me. Things matter to me in my life and I simply “judo” them into my writing. It feels so natural because I’m simply being and by writing what matters most, I find the writing to be fairly effortless.
Today ain’t no different.
Then again, I guess yesterday was different since I had no internet. #NeverAgain
This morning at my 6 AM gym class, we had two guests trying out CrossFit for the first time. Yes, the annoying athletic trend your Facebook friends won’t shut the fuck up about (I really try not to, I promise).
Talk about daunting. Our workout today was killer. Wanna see?
Aside from “What the hell is a Farmer’s Carry?”, the untrained eye to this kind of workout probably thinks, “NOPE. Not doing that.”
Especially not at 6 AM. But, here these guests were, bright and early, giving it a go.
I remember what it was like first starting these workouts.
I showed up for Foundations (a six day course that teaches fundamental movements used in CrossFit) at 6:30 PM back in the first week of September. The 5:30 PM class was in the middle of their workout as I was walking in. It’s the class with best athletes at the gym and they were just cruising through it.
“Wow, shit”, I thought. “I’m gonna look like a fucking moron.”
I had little experience with Olympic lifts and some of the core movements (i.e. — Deadlifts, Barbell Back Squats) I never learned properly.
But, that was totally fine. I don’t know what it is, but as a society, we seem to have this idea in our heads if you do something today and you’re terrible at it, well, you’re terrible at it and that’s that. YOU JUST SUCK. The cheap high of false superiority over others is like eating candy; tastes good in the moment and immediately like regret after.
And we also seem to have a comparison problem, like I just talked about above. I later learned that many of the 5:30 crowd has been in this kind of routine for YEARS.
Sure, some of them are probably naturally coordinated and athletic…and probably picked it up quicker than most people. But, I guarantee most of them were just as daunted and anxious about taking on this kind of stuff.
The point is: Everybody’s journey is different. There’s absolutely no point in getting caught up in comparisons.
The words of encouragement I got early on, especially being a dude who gets super frustrated when instructed how to do something and still can’t do it, erased doubt when I started feeling discouraged. As I improved, I knew I wanted to do the same for people just starting out as the veterans did for me at my beginning.
Today, I wanted to make sure the guests knew how big the accomplishment they just achieved was:
“Great job today, y’all. Way to finish!”
I meant it. I’m legitimately proud of anyone who tackles a big goal head on, knowing it won’t be easy, and gives it everything they had. The points, weights, time, stats, whatever.
All that matters is effort and drive.
Be that person who builds others up. Support the dreams of others. Encourage when there’s doubt. As much as I like to joke in my daily life, I’ve learned to leave it at the door when it comes to my goals. I don’t want to sell myself short, as much as I love self-deprecating humor. Not when it comes to my goals.
What can you do today to help somebody stay focused or begin a goal?
