God’s Choicest Blessings
I do believe in God. Really, I do. Many people do also which makes me question how we put our trust in that we cannot see. How and why we cry to who we cannot touch. There are many accounts of creation and how things became some pointing out with assuring details how it all happened. I guess it depends on the account we were exposed to or prone to believe. One thing I know is whatever story was written or told by someone somewhere. What I do know is that there exist a certain infinite power somewhere that somehow balances things out. There are different names and qualitative descriptions of this existence or the belief in the absence of such. I cannot explain much my belief but it is easier for me to. I pray. I find consolation and confidence in it. I recognize the various religions and beliefs. I respect the sacred. It is humbling for me. It gives me hope to ask for favors. This belief roots my own unique existence and connects it to those of others which provides a means to believe in our unique powers. Powering my resolve to do better because if we are all mere mortals and there is a bigger something out there so what is it should I be so worried about? Who is it that knows it or have it all?
I rounded up last month with a prayer or say letter to the universe. Putting out my worries out there. Today, last day in the month of August I am doing a similar thing. Writing to God. Thanking him for blessings, seen and unseen. And as we enter the last quarter of the year fondly known as the 'ember' months I have been looking back at the past months. I wish I can explain how it has been. There are no words. Lots of things still beat my imaginations. Many more became clearer. Some expectations weren’t met but some good ones came along and balanced that out. I feel blessed. Very well. I feel lucky. I am hopeful. I also reserve some credits to the resilience of my character and a certain strength I didn’t know I possessed. I thank thosw who helped me and I pray God bless them too. Many people have their conclusions and assumptions, wrong and distorted, some not even scratching close. I have no inclination to clear or explain because I also learned alot about humans. It was like a veil was lifted off my eyes. It’s all good.
Amidst it all I received an important gift which pertains to my writing — one of the things very important to me. This is a profession or habit that I cannot really separate from my person. There were lots of turbulence. My foundation was shaken if not uprooted because I look back and I cannot identify with someone that used to be me. Maybe it’s rebirth. Maybe it’s growth but dammit things over my head occurred for sure. Stripped down to the very basic of who I can sratch up to say I was or am I held on to my second nature, a topic I have discussed. And guess what? I improved. My writing improved and that means the world to me. Many works I have done in the past shaped up though they don’t have the platform I think or thought they deserve. Lol. But somehow, this new change that occurred in my person brought forth better. A story. A way of expression. A state of mind because this spills out in between the lines and produces the themes that form. A story. A way about it and life. Hope for the future in the middle of chaos. That blessings they say is behind certain disappointments peeped out at me and smiled lol. I wrote freely. I asked God to hold my hand. He, she, it, they? Did. I named a particular effort God’s Choicest Blessings and I claim it.
It is hard to talk about God sometimes because people make jokes about how you should go live in the church or become a pastor. Matter of fact since last year I got that personal closeness to God and yet a noticed distance to institutions which is confusing when I think about it. Yet, I study the greats and there exist a certain reverence for that higher power so who am I not to recognize especially when I enjoy God’s blessings everyday? I also noticed a bit of how people attest to things and this God. I guess it’s all about perspectives and understanding. My own relationship is personal and I don’t think I have a need to act in a certain way to prove anything. And I guess it is like that for everyone, each with their own ways. I might be too bold in the way I call on him in times of distress while acting also in my own capacity as a human. I am also surprised with a tendency people have in monopolizing their own impositions of godly ways and what they entail. I guess that’s why he is God. With everyone or most people calling on him there must be a way he handles it all. I humble myself and I pray. Mostly, I thank him for everything and also appreciate the good ones because God uses our fellow humans to bless us. It is our beautiful world and I cannot stop thinking and saying that it is God’s Choicest Blessings. Whatever and however it is. I give God praise. I pray my dreams come true.