An Open Letter to the Surviving Wasp From the Nest I Destroyed

You were probably only away from your home but a few hours. How long had passed in your world, however, is unclear to me; what is a week for me may constitute a generation for you. It is only now, upon your homecoming to a…

Predictions for Mayweather vs. McGregor

• You will have a hard time finding a parking spot.
• Michael Buffer and Bruce Buffer will play Rock-Paper-Scissors to see who will announce the fight. Bruce wins 2–1 and makes alot of money.
• At some point during…

Billy Joel Lyrics that Prove Millennials Have it Worse than Baby Boomers

It has become exceedingly popular to talk about how terrible Millennials are. From general complaints about being lazy Peter Pans to specific accusations that they killed vacations, the napkin industry…