On Being Content
There’s a story that I’ve heard, though I do not know its origin. My parents shared it with me so it may be a fable of the orient. It goes something like…
There was once a fisherman in a small village who lived by the beach. He was neither poor nor wealthy. He would go each day to the beach where he would catch enough fresh fish to feed his family and they were happy.
One day a wealthy businessman came to visit this beach and was on vacation. He saw the fisherman and asked, “Do you come here to fish everyday?” “Yes,” replied the man, “and I catch enough to feed my family.”
This was the opportunity the businessman was looking for to impart his wisdom. “Have you thought about working longer hours? I mean, if it’s that easy to catch fish, you could catch twice as much as you need and sell the extra.” The fisherman was perplexed, “And then what would I do?”
“Well,” the businessman confidently stated, “then you could save up enough to buy a boat and start catching bigger fish.”
The fisherman asked, “Hmm, and then what?”
“Well, then you’d start catching enough to hire a few people on the boat with you!”
“Okay, and then what?”
“After that you could catch enough to hire someone else to take the boat out… and at that point, you wouldn’t even have to fish!”
“Oh… but why?”
“So that you could get a nice place and relax by the beach like me!”
“I see. But sir, I am already doing that right now.”
I love this story because it reminds us that the finding simplicity of life is too easily overlooked. We work and work and work only to find… that life isn’t about work. It’s hard in America to remember that, since identity appears to be all about work. (“So… what do you do?” is often a first question to “get to know someone.”) Strange that we think we must work to earn our happiness as if it’s a penance, rather than consciously claiming it. I don’t think being content is something you chase; it’s something you let happen and accept.
Nobody is stopping you from enjoying the sunshine today. You don’t need to be at an exotic beach to enjoy it. It’s the same sun. This goes for fresh air, friends, family, and even our pets. These things are priceless, yet we somehow struggle to find time for them in the midst of our work. We, as a society, add so much complexity to our lives. On top of our careers, we over identify with a plethora of possessions and array of activities. We cope with the stress of work with entertainment. We find side pursuits to avoid confronting what we need to confront. And we even medicate our fatigue and anxiety with indulgent foods, coffee, alcohol, or other substances. Why are we so afraid to focus on the essentials and equally determined to bury them?
Can we slow down? Do we really need to get ahead? And is “getting ahead” what we really think it is? I would argue that having more possessions tends to make it even harder to enjoy them because of how many you could be enjoying! Let’s be clear — I’m not saying that developing as person is unimportant (and sometimes that does require having the right equipment). Learning and building new skills is very important. What I’m questioning is, past a certain standard of living, what are we really searching for? What are we trying to prove? Are we not seeing what’s right in front of us?
Let’s stop merely ranking and admiring the people on their wealth of assets. Let’s also start seeing whether they are truly content and whether they are generous souls. Let’s stop comparing our lives and feeling like we need to be at the top. Let’s start appreciating what we have and seeing what’s priceless. Let’s stop being afraid of the middle and seeing only two extremes (e.g. rich vs. poor). Let’s start finding a sustainable life that doesn’t make us perpetually feeling inadequate. You don’t need to retire early to find contentment. The time to be content is now.
