7 signs you are a strong (or weak) leader
Anyone who has been in the workforce, military or civilian, for longer than a day has probably come across both strong and weak leaders.
I certainly have.
The truth is that at times I have been a weak leader. Regrets are a waste of time, reflection on past mistakes in order to improve is not.
Some of the lessons I learned over the years weren’t from being successful; they were from failing. In fact, the best lessons are usually from failing.
I still am. What I refuse to do is quit. Every failure is the opportunity to learn, to grow, to be a little stronger than before.
We really only fail when we don’t analyze our mistakes and learn from them.
The point of this article is to help others learn from my experiences, successes, and most of all, my failures.
Strong leaders have difficult conversations when calm; weak leaders hide behind anger
Unless you are a complete sociopath, confronting others can be difficult.
Ever notice how much easier it is to confront someone when you are angry? This is the worse time to do so. Weak leaders hide behind anger. They only confront someone when their anger allows them to build up the courage to do so.
Strong Leaders work at having the hard conversations people need to hear. Why is this so important? It allows people to hear what you are saying. Screaming at someone guarantees that person won’t listen to what you have to say no matter how accurate the message is. Being told they are not up to par is difficult to hear for anyone, doing so in a calm collected manner gives the message the best possible chance to be heard.
Strong leaders are present; weak leaders are absent
Strong leaders are available to their people all the time, not just when it’s convenient. My job often requires those that work for me to respond at all hours of the night. One of the first things I tell those that work for me is that I am available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Period.
3 AM? I’m available. Weekends? I’m available. Vacation? I’m available.
The thing is, I don’t receive that many more calls from saying that. The critical thing is that my people are comfortable enough to call me immediately when they have a problem. A small fire is much easier to put out than a house fire.
Strong leaders give bad news in person; weak leaders send an email (or text)
The ability to email and text has made weak leadership easier. If you don’t want to have to see a reaction up close just send a text. Odds are that by the time you actually see the person, besides some awkwardness, you won’t really have to face their reaction in the moment.
Strong leaders give bad news in person. Sergeant Major of the Army, Daniel A. Dailey tells leaders to never do anything negative over email, ever.
“Email’s just tool, not a substitute for leadership” — SMA Dailey.
Strong leaders develop every member; weak leaders use members against each other
Every leader knows that one of the best ways to unite a team is to give them a common enemy. A single point of focus that every member can rally around. The problem is that groups have a tendency to pick out a member internally. The person who no one wants to include in social events outside of work. The person that people gossip about as soon as they leave the room.
Weak leaders use this to unite their teams. It gives teams one person to secretly dislike, to complain about. Weak leaders appreciate this in part because it’s not them and in part because it can initially increase the focus of their team. But it’s cancerous.
Strong leaders realize that a team requires every member and stop the gossiping in its tracks. They refuse to accept the petty bickering. They also realize that groups are very good at picking out the poor performers. If a group has that one person everyone loves to dislike, odds are they need some pretty significant development. Strong leaders recognize this and work to develop that weak member. This sends a powerful message to every member of the team.
They know that if you don’t tolerate the targeting of one teammate you won’t tolerate it with them either, and this provides a sense of safety that allows them to focus on their role within the team.
Most people want to do well and will if given the proper guidance and tools to develop.
Strong leaders directly confront problem members; weak leaders confront everyone.
We have a term for this in the military. It’s called a “shotgun blast”. Instead of directly confronting a person face to face, they “shotgun blast” the entire group. This is easier to do than actually face one person and tell them where they are wrong.
The problem with this is that it creates confusion within the group. Are they the ones being talked about? Amazingly, the only person who almost always assumes they weren’t the one being addressed is the person who needed to hear it the most.
Strong leaders have the hard conversations with the people that need to hear them. They don’t blast entire groups.
Strong leaders seek out the best candidate; weak leaders try to be the best candidate
I’ll be honest. I want everyone working for me to be better than I am. Why? Two reasons: 1) It means I can learn from everyone in the group and 2) my job is going to be really easy.
Weak leaders are scared of people working for them that are smarter, worker harder, or have more experience. They believe that they stand out by being seen as the best, the smartest, the brightest. Strong leaders realize that when great people work for them, not only is their job much easier but their team performs better.
Strong leaders deflect credit; weak leaders deflect blame.
It always amazes me when leaders try to stand up and take all the credit for the success of a project or group.
You want to build loyalty? When your boss praises your group, give credit to the people who deserve it. What do you think will happen on your next project or task? Those people will bend over backward to do amazing work for you in the future.
The flip side of this coin is when things go poorly. Weak leaders will be the first to stand up and point out why the actions of specific members caused the failure. This is flat out wrong. Strong leaders take ultimate responsibility for the failure of their team. If the team fails, the strong leader accepts that responsibility.
Leadership is not something you are born with. Sometimes it may seem that way. I can’t count the number of times I have heard “natural leader” used. Great leaders may make it look easy, but they are putting the work in behind the scenes to develop the skillset that is leadership.
Like anything, putting the effort in is required if you want to be successful. Successful leadership doesn’t happen without the work.
Great leaders constantly see self-improvement. It’s only when you quit doing so that you fail as a leader.
More articles on leadership by the author: Read about lessons learned, Why willpower does work, the importance of who we friend, a letter to my daughters and personal responsibility.
Dan’s passion is growing and developing the next generation of leaders. He has decades of experience as a leader and mentor through his time in the military and law enforcement. Interact with him on twitter @dantruex
