How To Get Him Back If You Broke His Heart: I Ended Things But Now I Want Him Back
How to get him back if you broke his heart — I ended things but now I want him back.
You feel so guilty about the break up. You know that you have caused him a lot of pain and misery when you broke up with him. But now you realized that he is really the one for you. You love him beyond all else.
How can you get back your boyfriend if you have broken his heart? You have spent a lot of restless nights thinking about ways to get him back. But you realize that all those ways will not work, because you have broken his heart.
Here are a few tips that may help you to get back your boyfriend if you have broken his heart.
Give him time to recover from the break up. He is under mental and emotional stress after the break up, so give him time to recover from it. Do not communicate with him during this time. Leave him alone to cope with the pain.
Be humble. Humility is a virtue that can move mountains and soften a rock hard heart. When you think he has recovered enough and is ready to talk with you, make the first move. Test the waters by sending a short text message that asks how he is. But don’t flood him with text messages every few minutes. Do it once the first time. If he does not respond, let a day pass before you send another. Do this intermittently until he responds. When he responds to you, you can start short text message conversations once a day and eventually progress to short calls. At the first opportunity, apologize to him for causing his heart break.
Show your concern for him but don’t overdo it. Healing his broken heart will make him a stronger person, but let him know that you are there for him. You are a friend that he can rely on. Be his friend at this time when he is emotionally down. Show that you still care for him, despite the break up but don’t let him rely on you. Give him room to stand on and to make his own decisions.
Encourage him to decide what he should do. Give subtle hints about getting back together but don’t push. Your presence and concern for him has made him realize that you can get back together even if you have broken his heat. But he is afraid to take another chance with you. Work on that feeling. Try your very best to get him to trust you again with his heart.
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If you recently split up with your boyfriend, you may have already tried to get him back. You are thinking obsessively, how to get my ex boyfriend back, calling or texting him, and scheming feverishly about what to do next. It may be time to stop, look and listen to your behavior. You need a fresh approach to make him fall in love with you again.
Try to think how you appear to your ex boyfriend. Did you whine, beg or plead to get back together, for another chance? Did you try to break up his relationship with his new girlfriend? That is not good. Your ex may be saying to himself, This is childish and immature behavior. You do not want that, of course. So here are 6 things not to do if you are thinking, I want to get my ex boyfriend back.
1. Do not follow him around, or “accidentally” show up where he is. You will appear to be a stalker;
2. Do not call or text him several times a day. Call only when you have something special or specific to say;
3. Do not beg or plead to get back together, or cry. You should appear calm, thoughtful and mature at all times;
4. If you do run into your ex somewhere, be polite. Ask how he is, and be pleasant even if he is with another girl. Keep it short. Then leave with your head held high;
5. Your goal is to get your ex boyfriend back, so do not go out with someone else just to make him jealous. It rarely works. It will likely make him mad, and create further misunderstandings and confusion between you. And it is especially unfair to the third person, who is just being used for your convenience;
6. Do not sit at home staring at the four walls, plotting furiously about how to get my ex boyfriend back. This will only make things worse. Go out with your friends, whom you probably neglected somewhat while you were a couple. Keep busy. Take a class, start a new hobby, refresh your wardrobe, and take better care of your health.
OK, these are the things not to do. But let’s face it. If you are thinking, I want to get my ex boyfriend back fast, you are going to have to take more positive steps. You need a plan of action. The first thing to do is to change your attitude. You want to appear poised, confident and friendly. You should actually radiate good feeling to everyone around you.
How in the world are you going to do that, when you are still feeling angry and hurt over your breakup? Well, you cannot get your ex boyfriend back if you want to strangle him on sight. So do this. Sit down and write a letter to your boyfriend. Pour out all your pain, anger, anxiety, deception, feelings and thoughts, both good and bad.
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Write down everything that happened to you, as you see it. List how you felt about your ex at the beginning of the relationship, and how your feelings gradually changed. Hold nothing back. Then describe what you think the two of you should do now, and where you go from here. Be honest and direct with yourself and your ex. Mention the good times you had together, as well as the fights and disagreements.
Pour it all out. When you think you have got it all, and there is nothing left inside you, then you are done. Re-read the letter a few times, while thinking of your ex boyfriend. This will tend to put things in perspective for you. Then, BURN the letter! That’s right, burn it! On NO account should you actually send it to your ex, or to anyone.
By burning the letter, you are turning a page in your life, and moving on. The previous chapters are finished, over and done with. From this moment on, it is a new you, with a fresh, optimistic attitude. The past is in the past, where it belongs. No one can change it. But you are in control of your present and future.
The new you can get your ex boyfriend back, if you are thoughtful and self-assured. I do not mean you should sweep your problems under a rug. Far from it. The two of you broke up for a reason, or several reasons. These reasons, or difficulties, must be discussed and fixed, if you are to have any hope of a long term, successful relationship with your man.
But now you can tackle those problems with less of the emotional baggage you were carrying around before. Talk about it with your ex, and see if you can find compromises and understanding. Some couples get back together without fixing or even talking about their underlying problems. And things seem to go well at first. It may feel like a wonderful, second honeymoon.
Both of you feel like you have saved the relationship, and kept the other from making a terrible mistake. But sooner or later, the old quarrels will jump up again and trip you up. So try to reach some kind of compromise or accommodation now. No relationship or marriage is perfect, because we humans are not perfect. So do not try for perfect or ideal solutions to your differences.
Good communication and a willingness to compromise on both sides will surely solve your problems, as much as they can in fact be solved in any relationship. I hope these ideas help put you on the road to a renewed, loving relationship with your “ex” boyfriend, who will soon be back in your arms and not an ex at all!
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