My Ex Wants To Be Friends After He Dumped Me: He Breaks Up With You but Wants To Be Friends
My ex wants to be friends after he dumped me — He breaks up with you but wants to be friends.
Your ex boyfriend wants to be friends. It’s a far cry from what you ultimately want, which is to be his girlfriend again. You’re torn about whether or not you should agree to be just friends with a man you’re still so much in love with. You’ll find that anyone you ask about this will have a different opinion. Some friends may tell you that you need to avoid falling into the friendship trap if you want more. They’re wrong. Becoming friends with an ex boyfriend is actually one of the most effective ways to reconnect romantically with him.
The fact that your ex boyfriend wants to be friends with you suggests something very significant. He obviously misses you and wants to be close to you again. If he was completely over you, he would have moved on and not wanted to remain in contact with you. The fact that he’s the one initiating the friendship is something you should see as a step towards reconciliation. You do have to be mindful of a few things as you begin this new friendship with the man you love.
In order to use being friend with an ex boyfriend as a means to get him back, you have to allow him to set the tone for the friendship. Trying to contact him every day to talk, or asking him to hang out every weekend, will likely cause him to pull back significantly. He’ll feel pressured into something more and he’ll assume that you’ve misunderstood his intentions. There’s a huge difference between being friends and being romantic partners. Don’t ever lose sight of that.
Let him set the pace. Don’t be the one to always call him. Let him do that first and then once he has, you can take your turn and call him the following week. Keep your conversations very neutral and easy going. Talk about what’s going on in your life but steer clear of mentioning what’s happening in your dating life. Doing so won’t help matters any. If you’re not dating anyone your ex boyfriend may think that’s because you’re waiting for him to come back to you. If you are dating someone, he’ll take that to mean that you’ve moved on and he may do the same.
Throughout your blossoming friendship stay away from bringing up what happened between the two of you in the past unless he does first. Instead, focus on being supportive and caring. Show him that you’re still someone he can have a great time with. Make him laugh and keep him interested by showing how self confident and mature you really are.
Over time he’ll start to let his defenses down and he’ll want to be even closer again. By then you’ll have a new bond with him and your renewed romance will hit the ground running because it’s based on a solid and mutually satisfying friendship.
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Do you want to get your boyfriend back? Is your heart absolutely shattered since your breakup and you just aren’t sure what to do to get him back? You have some ideas of what you think might work but so far nothing has been able to change his mind and you are desperate for a way to get him back.
There are a couple of things that are crucial to your eventual success in getting your boyfriend back and also some tactics that have proven powerfully effective in helping many women to get their boyfriend back even after the most horrible of breakups.
Time — You might have heard it said that time heals all wounds and this is absolutely true. In time there is a very good chance that your boyfriend will forget all about the negative things about your relationship and be able to look back with fondness at the time the two of you spent together. Of course, it may take many months if not years to get to that point so this kind of time is a luxury that you probably don’t have right now.
A little bit of time spent apart can be helpful in allowing him to begin to miss you a little bit and to allow the dust to settle from your breakup. Take advantage of this time and get your emotions under control. When the time does come to open up the lines of communication again you will need to be as strong as possible to keep from falling apart in front of your ex.
Confidence — While too much confidence can come off as being conceited or even a little bit crazy, a little self confidence in your ability to get your boyfriend back goes a long way. Remain confident and know that your boyfriend can fall in love with you again. You are quite loveable, aren’t you?
You might not feel very confident right now but once upon a time he did love you and it is entirely possible for him to fall in love with you again if you try to cultivate a little confidence in yourself. Remember how he used to look at you and the sound of his voice and how his arms felt around you. You can feel that way again with a little confidence and some careful planning.
Just as a side note, too much confidence does come off as being a little bit crazy. It is fine to know in your heart that you can pull this off but wandering around telling everyone that you know that he will fall in love with you again or telling him that you are going to win him back just comes off as a little bit psycho.
Connection — Without a connection with your boyfriend it is going to be nearly impossible to get him back. Once he does feel connected to you again and his heart begins to soften it will be time to pull him back to you. Once the warm fuzzy memories of time spent together begin to fill his mind and warm his heart the game is just about over and your boyfriend will be ripe for the picking.
But how do you build that connection? While it is possible to weasel your way back into his life by going the friend route it is also possible to use male psychology and emotions to cause him to begin to feel some very powerful emotions for you that he probably thought were long dead. The friend route can be a little risky since it is possible for him to believe that you no longer have an interest in a romantic relationship with him which he might take as a sign that it is OK to move on to another relationship.
The more effective route and the one that many women have found more success and in a shorter period of time involves using male psychology to bring out those emotions that will lead to a powerful and almost instantaneous connection with your ex.
As you can see, by using a little time to allow things to settle down, some self confidence and by creating a connection with your ex it is possible to get him back both quickly and easily.
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