Misty Rose: Nature
Chapter 21
Like I said, I don’t really get to sleep on things, really, so I hadn’t come up with anything better when sunset came around. But Kaitlyn wasn’t home yet, so I at least got some time to myself. Not that it helped. By the time she got back, I didn’t have any better ideas either.
That… actually went on for a few days. We hung out, and had the usual conversations. I went hunting a couple times, then bitched about the assholes I’d found. We watched stuff on our phones and… you know, I really don’t need to describe it all. Nothing much happened for like a week. It was actually right after Kaitlyn made me watch another shitty vampire movie that I finally managed to actually talk about what Pops had said. This was another one I don’t want to talk about, but that’s kind of where the whole night started so… yeah.
“Well, that was an hour and a half of my life I won’t get back,” I said.
“But you’re immortal,” Kaitlyn grinned at me. “You’ve got forever.”
I rolled my eyes. “Yes, I’m immortal,” I said. “And it’s still an hour and a half of my life I won’t get back. That movie… pretty much just exists to have a hot chick doing sexy things.”
“So bad it was good,” Kaitlyn said.
“No. It was just bad.”
“Oh, come on. It wasn’t that bad.”
“Yes it was. F minus.”
“So why’re you quoting it, then?”
I sighed. “That was not a quote from the movie.”
“I don’t get why you hate it so much.”
“Because… ugh…” I said. “Look, that last fight scene was… just two bad actors flailin’ around with prop swords, but they sped it up so it’d look more like an actual fight.”
“Okay,” Kaitlyn said. “I’ll give you that. But still.”
“I’m gonna…” I picked up my phone and did a search. “Okay, see? Rotten Tomatoes. Zero percent positive reviews. It’s terrible.”
“Yeah, but Eileen from Eileen and Ben is in it.”
“Who?”
“Eileen and Ben. Britpop.”
“Since when did you start likin’ Britpop?”
Kaitlyn just folded her arms and put on a pouting face. It was cute, but… I don’t know. Sometimes she can just be a pain in the ass, and the whole bad vampire movie thing was exactly that. And now Kaitlyn was doing the not talking to me thing. “Look,” I said. “I’m sorry I’m bein’ a bitch about this. But that movie was just awful.”
Kaitlyn just kept pouting and not looking at me.
“Fine. Then don’t talk,” I said. And we didn’t. Think we did that for like an hour. Me going around… cleaning things up or looking at stuff on my phone, and her sitting on her bed pouting. Caught her looking at me a few times, but that didn’t change anything.
What did change wasn’t what I was expecting. Or, well, maybe I was, just that it didn’t make sense until I thought about it. It was… well, I think I’ve talked about how sometimes I could hear Kaitlyn’s heartbeat, right? Some weird vampire thing maybe. Well, that whole I’m not talking to you thing got me started really listening for anything Kaitlyn said. Or did, really. And after a little while, I realized I could hear her heart beating. Which was a little weird. But the really weird thing was that sometimes her heart would speed up for a little while. And it was always when I was doing something… interesting to look at. Like bending over to pick something up where she could see my butt. Or reaching for something in a way that… sort of stretched out my body. I wasn’t wearing a lot, just what I wear to sleep, and… every time I’d hear Kaitlyn’s heart speed up a little, I’d look at her and catch her looking at me. It was… a lot like being around a guy, like when they think you’re being sexy or whatever, but you’re just walking or doing stuff and not even trying to give them something to look at.
That was what made it make sense. But just to be sure, I… did a few extra things. To see how she’d react. And yeah, her heart sped up, and she was looking at me. So at some point… I stopped not being her type. Which would explain a few things. And make some things complicated. But she was just going to have to understand that I was a vampire, so nothing was going to happen. No telling what my inner vampire might… decide to do to her, and I wasn’t going to let it.
So finally I went and sat down on Kaitlyn’s bed right in front of her. I tried to look right into her eyes, but she looked away. “Fine,” I said. “Don’t talk. But I got a couple things I’m gonna talk about.” I could do that. Being annoyed might help get through my hang ups.
“First thing,” I said. “I figured out why you’re bein’ the way you are. Annoyin’ me and makin’ me uncomfortable and stuff. Well, Pops figured it out, but he helped me get it. Finally.”
Kaitlyn didn’t respond.
“It’s ’cause you’re scared of me,” I said, still looking at her eyes. “You’re tryin’ to not be scared of me, so you’re… makin’ me watch bad vampire movies and gettin’ on my case and… other stuff that makes me less scary to you. And I get that. Just remember that…” I paused. “That I got this thing inside me that makes me angry, okay? I might tell you to stop and really mean it.”
Kaitlyn was still looking away, but now wasn’t pouting at least.
“So we could… I dunno, come up with somethin’ I only say or do when you’re goin’ too far,” I said. “Right now I just… walk away, and that might still be a good idea. Just in case.”
“Safe word,” Kaitlyn said, still not looking at me. “It’s called a safe word.”
Well, at least she was talking now, right? “Somethin’ like that,” I said. “Least until I can get things completely under control. But until then, either you gotta stop annoyin’ me, or you gotta put up with my bein’ bitchy about things sometimes. Like about shitty vampire movies. Okay?”
“Okay,” Kaitlyn said.
“Good. Second thing…” I took a deep breath. This wasn’t going to be easy. Harder in a lot of ways because… this was basically changing something in our relationship and… I almost felt like I was friendzoning her. Which was stupid, but I really didn’t want to have to deal with Kaitlyn’s attention in that way when being a vampire was still a pain in the ass. Not like I thought it’d ever stop being a pain, but I might get more used to it. And I’d probably have to talk about that too.
“Stop that,” Kaitlyn said. I gave her a blank look because I didn’t know what she was talking about. “You’re flicking your fingernails,” Kaitlyn said. And yeah, I was. Remember that habit I said I picked up where I’d flick the little split in my nail? Yeah, that. I made my hands into fists so I’d stop flicking my nail and that sort of helped.
“Sorry,” I said. “Um… okay, so… you know how you been… makin’ jokes and stuff at me? Stuff about… I dunno, me bein’ a stripper or just… touchin’ me in places?”
Kaitlyn shrugged. “They’re just jokes.”
“I don’t think they are,” I said, watching Kaitlyn’s face. She sort of froze for a moment, then laughed, which was actually what I expected. She did that when she didn’t want to talk about something. Tried to pretend it was just a joke and wasn’t important. But it was.
“That’s a load of shit,” Kaitlyn said. “You’re not my type.”
I waited until I was sure I had her attention again, then raised my arms and stretched my body in a way that… well, I did when I was trying to get a guy interested in me. You know, the back arch. I usually tried to avoid doing that because it might send the wrong message to my guy friends. But it worked when I did do it, and it worked this time too. Kaitlyn’s eyes followed the movement just like the guys’ eyes would, lingered for a moment before going back to my face. Her heart sped up too.
“That’s not fair,” Kaitlyn said. “Anyone would look at you doing that.”
“Uh huh,” I said. “But your heart was beatin’ faster, too.”
“Still doesn’t mean anything,” Kaitlyn folded her arms and scowled.
“Do I gotta try other stuff?”
Kaitlyn shrugged, then gave me a dirty grin. “Sure. Sounds fun.”
I shook my head. “That’s what I’m talkin’ about,” I said. “You usedta ignore that stuff. Now you’re… well, you’re like a guy. Tryin’ to look without me seein’ you look. But I see it.”
Kaitlyn went back to scowling. “I still say you’re full of shit,” she said, looking away.
“Fine,” I said, rolling my eyes. “But you’re still gonna listen to what I hafta say.”
“Fine.”
“First off, I’m not mad at you,” I said. “’Cause it’s you. Y’know? Not like… um… I think you can’t control yourself. But ‘cause… I know you’re not gonna do anything I don’t want. Okay?”
Kaitlyn just nodded, still not looking at me.
“But, um, second…” I said. This was getting hard. “You’re gonna hafta stop usin’ me to… scam drinks outa guys. ‘Cause… well, you’re gonna hafta remember somethin’ about me.”
Kaitlyn went back to pouting when I said she’d have to stop scamming drinks.
“I’m serious here,” I said. “That’s gonna hafta stop.”
“Why?”
“’Cause of bein’ a vampire,” I said. “I told you ‘bout that. The animal or whatever that some vampires have? Well… mine’s got some… really nasty ideas about you.”
I didn’t ever actually talk about that, did I? Okay. Short version is that there’s all kinds of vampires, but the biggest difference is about being one of two types of vampires. They’ve got a lot of fancy names, like the Quick and the Dead, for some reason, or Savages and Corpses. But what it really means is that some vampires get more emotional than they were as humans, while others get less emotional. And as they get less human, it gets worse. Savages get more and more angry and hungry and nasty, and more likely to freak out and hurt a lot of people. Corpses get less emotional and less… I don’t know, less able to see people as people, and they don’t freak out. The scary lady said it had a lot to do with the person, who they were as well as being a vampire, but I’m not going to go into that. All that’s important right now is that based on my having freaked out a couple times, I’m a savage. Sometimes it could be bad enough to feel like it was something else in my head. Something that wasn’t me.
“Fuck your animal,” Kaitlyn said. “Tell it I hate it too.”
“Not that kinda nasty. Kaitlyn, it wants you.”
That got her attention. She stopped pouting and looked right at my eyes.
“Yeah,” I said. “Been actin’ like that since the party. When I saved you. It… thinks you’re it’s property, pretty much. Wants to… um… do things to you.”
“Like what?”
“Like… what those guys wanted to do. And worse things. And it wants to drink you.”
Kaitlyn froze again, then shrugged in her I don’t care routine. “Fuck it. I’m not scared of you.”
“Yeah, well… sometimes it notices you lookin’ at me,” I said. Which was true. The stereotype of the oversexed vampire chick that threw herself legs first at everything? She’d be a savage. “And it… sorta makes me wanna do more stuff to… lure you in. Like I’d lure a guy.”
“That’d be fun to watch,” Kaitlyn said, grinning. “Bring it.”
I think that’s what did it. I realize now this was a stupid thing to do, but… I’m pretty sure part of me decided Kaitlyn wasn’t… being properly respectful or something. Or maybe it was a being dominant thing. I don’t know. But this idea arrived in my head and I acted on it before thinking about it. I raised my hand like I was going to rub my nose, then more or less jumped on Kaitlyn, ending up with one hand on her shoulder pushing her down onto her bed with the other holding down her hip, half over her, with my face right up in hers, staring down into her eyes. I could also feel that my fangs were out just enough to be visible. I’d honestly moved faster than I thought I could, so my brain caught up with me slightly after I’d pinned Kaitlyn down, and I figure I probably had my thirsty vampire face on. I held her for a moment or two while I fought back against whatever the hell made me jump Kaitlyn, because I thought I was going to bite her if I let myself. Then I more or less threw myself off her bed and went to the other side of the room, facing away from Kailyn. And in my head, I was pissed at myself for doing what I did, and for letting it happen and for… for wanting to keep going and… also kinda worried because I could hear Kaitlyn’s heart beating a lot faster behind me. Fear, yeah, but… something about her breathing also sounded… excited. Which really didn’t help me deal with how much I wanted to keep going. But I wrapped my arms around myself and made myself stay where I was. Stayed there for a while, actually. I’m not kidding about the savage side of me sometimes feeling like something other than me. This was one of those times it sort of… acted without asking me first.
“I think…” Kaitlyn started, then swallowed. “I think I see what you mean.”
I didn’t say anything. That was… pretty much exactly where I didn’t want the whole talk to go, even though I wanted to somehow warn Kaitlyn about what just happened. How part of me… wanted to do things to her that I’d never do, even if I didn’t know about the shit she’d been through. I mean, the shit the savage part wanted to do was bad enough, but it’d be seriously fucked up to do it to a friend, and if she’d already been through some of the stuff I knew she had… yeah. Corpse type vampires could be cruel because they didn’t care about other people, but savages could end up fucking enjoying hurting people like that. I could hear her slowly calming down, but I still felt like shit. Like a monster.
“I think you’re right,” Kaitlyn said. “The scamming thing… hasta stop. Won’t do that anymore. And I’ll… try to stop looking at you.”
“Good,” I said, still not turning around. “I don’t wanna hurt you.”
“Thanks.”
“I’m… sorry I jumped on you. My vampire side… kinda took over. I think.”
“I understand.”
“Good,” I said. “But… it’s not ’cause I’m mad, okay?”
“I know,” Kaitlyn said.
And honestly, it seemed like she did. Next few days, I didn’t catch her looking at me, least not like she had been. Of course, I also made a point of wearing what I’d wear to sleep during the winter. Our heater didn’t work too great, so we’d wear heavier things to sleep. More covering. I didn’t need the extra warmth because of being dead, but… I figured it’d be better to not add to the problem for a while. And it really did seem like Kaitlyn had gotten over it. Which was good. Much easier to deal with her when she wasn’t… setting off that part of me. Or getting too attached to me. Um… in the wrong ways. You know what I mean. I also noticed she’d started carrying the pepper spray she’d bought even at home. It had this… belt clip thing, so she’d just clip it to whatever she was wearing. I didn’t say anything of course. Rather have a green face than… have something go bad. But I do got to say it was kinda nice to have some time where everything seemed to be normal again, you know?
Yeah, I keep saying that, but when you’ve been a vampire for long enough, you start liking when things are dull and normal, because of how they could get when they weren’t dull.
