My wife and I keep a collection of some of the funniest things that our seven-year-old boy has said over the years.
February 26th, 2014
A Story Each Day
I walked into the open office space and there he was. It wasn’t even ten o’clock, and he was already set up and…
There’s nothing more frustrating than someone not knowing what you’re made for. I’m a computer, so that should be self-evident. We’re in the twenty-first…
Do you know what I feel like saying to myself? Do you know what I feel like declaring over my own existence right now?
I knelt and slid a couple of those grimy arcade coins into “Lethal Manipulators” and stood, confident and ready for an early 90’s digital battle. At eight years old…
My thoughts dwindle and wander toward death — not for any reason in particular, I guess I’m…
You were walking through Times Square. Okay, if I were going to be honest, I’d describe it more like waddling. You were waddling through Times Square, although I’m not sure I could blame you…
May 3rd, 2014
I got a small glimpse into my future today, although if you’d asked me yesterday, I would’ve disagreed and argued with it. It was the kind of glimpse…
Black or white, or blue or green, or red, or yellow. There is no in-between. You can’t have them all, because mixing them just results in an…
Please be aware that this story contains harsh language.