Antidotes for Chimps

Neighbourhood Watch Report #5000 [be afraid, be very afraid]

This milestone report is the most…

What the fuck is this and how the fuck do I fold it?

The pile contains complexities man could never…

Mike Tyson At The Funfair

Me and my buddy Big Ears Avery take a trip to the funfair to loosen up

Book Me — Jean-Claude Van Damme — For Your Charity Event Today

I Like To Put My Dick Through Fences

No fence is safe. It just feels so right.

Mike Tyson At The Walmart Deli

The deli can be a hard place, especially for Mike Tyson.

As A Magpie I’d Like To Apologise

We’ve taken too many eyeballs.

I Am The Cloud That Will Ruin Your Day

Feel my watery consignment.

I Accidentally Injected Myself With Dog DNA

My desire to please has skyrocketed