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Banterist
Original humor writing & commentary by Brian Sack. Subject to all the flexible quality standards of internet self-publishing.
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Ladies and Gentlemen of the Jury, Please Don’t Look at Me Right Now
Ladies and Gentlemen of the Jury, Please Don’t Look at Me Right Now
Thank you, your honor.
Brian Sack
Oct 19, 2017
This Super Secret Memo Shows How Staples Discourages Shoplifting
This Super Secret Memo Shows How Staples Discourages Shoplifting
There’s more to “Hello, welcome to Staples!” than you’d think.
Brian Sack
Jan 31, 2017
6 All-You-Can-Eat Breakfast Bar Tips from a Navy SEAL!
6 All-You-Can-Eat Breakfast Bar Tips from a Navy SEAL!
The go-to information source for all listicles: Navy SEALs!
Brian Sack
Jan 26, 2017
Do I Regret Being Stuck in Your Chimney? Absolutely.
Do I Regret Being Stuck in Your Chimney? Absolutely.
I’ll be honest with you. This is not the outcome I wanted. And I know it’s not something you wanted to deal with when you got home. Are you…
Brian Sack
Jun 16, 2016
I Am Not in Cirque De Soleil, I’m Just Caught in Your Drapes
I Am Not in Cirque De Soleil, I’m Just Caught in Your Drapes
Brian Sack
Jun 23, 2016
I Love Being a Clown and Not Killing People
I Love Being a Clown and Not Killing People
Ever since I can remember, I have wanted to entertain people, not kill them. That’s why I became a clown.
Brian Sack
Sep 8, 2016
Sure I’m Sexy, but Mining Coal Isn’t Any Easier
Sure I’m Sexy, but Mining Coal Isn’t Any Easier
Looks aren’t everything, and now I know.
Brian Sack
Sep 19, 2016
I’m the Schmuck Who Totally Changed Your Recipe Then Gave You a Bad Review
I’m the Schmuck Who Totally Changed Your Recipe Then Gave You a Bad Review
Hi! I appreciate you posting your recipe with photos. I know it takes time and effort to do so. That said, I changed half the ingredients…
Brian Sack
Jun 14, 2016
Excerpts From the Higgins Commission Report on Wendy Being a Big Mommy Pain in the Ass
Excerpts From the Higgins Commission Report on Wendy Being a Big Mommy Pain in the Ass
The definitive report
Brian Sack
May 16, 2016
7 Things Your Financial Planner Says When He’s Bad
7 Things Your Financial Planner Says When He’s Bad
“The numbers looked more bigger the last time I looked at the paper with all the numbers on it.”
Brian Sack
Nov 1, 2016
Your Cat’s Eulogy for You
Your Cat’s Eulogy for You
Amen.
Brian Sack
May 25, 2016
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