Having It Some

A Conversation About Planning My Son’s Wedding

“Mommy?”

The Great Wall of Seltzer

If there is one flavor that sums up my entire Italian-American upbringing in Dyker Heights, it’s seltzer. Not the…

I Survived Three Rounds on ‘Chopped’

Last week, my gigantic head was plastered on televisions across the country when I appeared as…

The Sad Story of Paula Deen

The Queen of Food Network, Paula Deen, has been fired for, as I’ve seen described by 50% of internet users…

Embracing My Thirties, As a Stranger Pees on Me

The August sun warmed my shoulders as I placed my youngest son in the “stop and frisk” position against the barricades of the “Peek-a-Bug” ride, so that I could spray every inch of his five-year-old flesh with SPF 80 sunblock. Deftly balancing two…

What Tourists Need to Know About NYC

There is no more important rule to surviving in this town than this

I attribute much of my professional and personal success to the fact that I’m a native New Yorker. No other breed of human…

I Don’t Understand America

When I was a kid growing up in Brooklyn, I didn’t travel, as my father didn't see much use for it. “Why get on a…

The Awful Truth About Jogging

You thought I wouldn’t find out, runners? Your lies stop now!