“Shhh: 15 Forbidden Thoughts For An African Woman”

They will say, “not my Africa”. They will say, I exaggerate. They will say ‘this does not happen in the cities’…

Joshua Abner. Pexels.com

READ: Stay In Your Comfort Zone.

You don’t think them. They don’t exist.

1. I don’t think I am maternal. I will not have children. They call it “child-free”. I will be child- Shhh… say that to your mother, I dare you. Just say that, you…you…you useless…!
2. Orgas-what? You want doggy style? You want me to locate the g-spot? You want foreplay? You want me to take care and find out what you like in bed? All this headache for common sex? What do you know about orgasms? Shhh. *Shut your legs you prostitute*.
3. I cannot marry. I do not ever want to be married. I want my own space and… Shhh *your village people are laughing at your uselessness already*
4. Dear hubby, I want your mother to call before she comes to visit us every 2 weeks. I want your father to ask if we have enough money to feed before requesting that you send money for his kindred meeting hosting. I want you to talk to me before moving your brother into our home. I want… Shhh *what witchcraft is this? You want to breakup generational peace? Just shut up*
5. I can dress however I want. Shhh *So you don’t know how to advice yourself again? Do you want to become the kind of woman that men feel entitled to approach and harass, pulling on their hair and pushing them around while calling them names? Try it*
6. I want to earn as much money and if I out-earn my partner, so be it. Shhh *so your plan is to emasculate every man now? What next? You will run for presidency?*
7. I want to explore my sexuality. Shhh *your mind has left the building*
8. I am equal to my partner. Equal rights and justice. Equality… Shhh *over there is ‘every woman’ breaking down your guts with their side-eyes. So you don’t have sense? Even if you think you can have equal rights with any man, how dare you say it?*
9. I want only 1 child. Shhh *no you don’t*
10. I want 3 kids and if they are all girls, so be it. Shhh *no boy? ha ha ha. This one was a comedian in her former life*
11. “How many men have you been with?” Besides you? Just that… Shhh *you were raped. You have never been with anyone else willingly*
12. Now speaking about raped, you were actually raped? Shhh *hide your shame*
13. You were raped by your uncle? Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
14. You do not think you identify fully as a woman? Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
15. I will leave my husband if he cheats on me or he is abusive. Shhh *leave who? To where? And live how? Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh*

Thank you for reading.

My name is Adaobi Okwy. Please turn on Email Notification for my next post. Also, Buy me coffee?