Coronavirus Diary-Day 0

Day 0

I started a new medication on Monday, an antibiotic for an infection. During lunch on Tuesday, I realized that everything was bland, and tasted the same. I tried tasting and smelling raw garlic and ground coffee. I ate a spoonful of a vinegary Mexican hot…

Anger

I like vision boards. I don’t believe in The Law Of Attraction, but I like goals, and a visual reminder of goals is helpful for my ADHD monkeybrain. Plus, I think they’re neat. For the past few years, my boards have had a picture of a tiger, a sloppy thing I put together in MS paint,with the words “healthy…

Hormones and Self-Love

In a recent conversation with my partner, the subject drifted to Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT). I mentioned that I’d thought about trying supplemental testosterone in the past. My partner asked why I’d thought of it.I see adds for it online (seeing one, after the conversation about it…

From Survival Mode To Thriving

My brain can be a mess-recently diagnosed ADHD, PTSD, anxiety, parenting a special-needs child, and escaping a long, abusive relationship has taken a toll. I’ve felt, for a few years, that I was just barely keeping myself alive, as I drifted between trauma and depressive…

Stumbling into suppressed memories

I can think of several times when conversation uncovered an old…

I was old until my late 30’s.

I was trying to do everything right, and had internalized the idea that I shouldn’t wear a t-shirt in public. I was reading popular men’s blogs at the time which said, in one way or another, to grow up, to man up. As a result, I was a very serious person with a largely unexamined life. My closet…

Coronavirus Diary, Day 1

Day 1

I woke up feeling better, but still no olfactory capabilities. I am married and have 3 kids, and having to sequester myself in the bedroom is difficult. I want to help my spouse. I want to hold my kids. I want to make myself a sandwich. I feel like I’ve…

I gotta say, I’m not a big fan of pandemics.

There’s no precedent for 21st Century people being collectively cut off from the outside world for a long time outside of war/genocide. It’s affected people across class, race, gender, and ability. If I didn’t have to go to work, I would not be…