A Murderer’s Self-Assessment
He doesn’t have a story. He’s not significant.
“I don’t think anything about me is remarkable,” Damian said.
It’s a sentiment he’s repeated several times over the course of eight months.
“At the end of the day, I don’t think I’m doing anything special.”
Damian was a foundational member of the group of Limon Correctional Facility prisoners who started a CrossFit program so successful in building community that the Colorado Department of Corrections is actively working to duplicate it at other prisons across the state.
The program has brought together men across racial lines and offered a path for betterment. Regardless of how you feel about Damian or Damian’s crime, the truth is he’s making people better. It’s more than many of us will accomplish in a lifetime.
A testament to this is how many people would argue against his “I’m nothing special” comments.
But you can understand the roots of his self-assessment. He’s had 15 years to think about what he’s done and to try to understand why he did it. For starters, his childhood was terrifying.
“I think a lot of my problem was I kept shit bottled up my entire life,” Damian explained. “I never showed emotion with my family.”
His father was a violent alcoholic. His mother wasn’t loving.
From an impossibly young age, Damian started suppressing his emotions.
“I dealt with a lot of my shit on my own. I never had anybody to talk about stuff with.”
He continued: “I think it’s unhealthy to keep that shit inside you and bottle it up because I think it might explode one day.”
About the Author
Andréa Maria Cecil is a career editor and writer whose experience includes six years as Assistant Managing Editor and Head Writer at CrossFit Inc. headquarters. She spent the first 12 years of her professional life as a journalist — starting with The Associated Press in Detroit and Baltimore — before transitioning to content marketing with an emphasis on authentic storytelling. She is the editor of “Speal: A David and Goliath Story” by Chris Spealler that sold 10,000 copies worldwide.
