TGYN Philly Bar Bracket: Round of 32
In an NCAA-style Tournament, Which Bar Would Reign Supreme?
This is the Round of 32. You can find an intro, including our rules thought process behind the tournament, here. You can find the Round of 64 here.
We’re into the round of 32, which means even some of the much-adored bars that were able to make it past the first round could face some tough challenges. Look, if it were up to me I’d let all the bars win. They’re all great and they really leave it all out there on the field…I mean court…I mean…uh…on the bar? Dancefloor? This metaphor is falling apart pretty quickly so let’s jump into things.
There’s still a ton of match-ups this round, so we’re still going to be judging these almost entirely on how we feel about them. We’ll be establishing some more concrete rating guidelines (and maybe even some reader participation) starting in the Sweet 16.
Also, please ignore the seedings on the graphics. The seedings in the text reflect the ones we’re using.
The Eastern State Region
(Fairmount, Brewerytown, University City)
(1) Jack’s Firehouse vs (8) London Grill
John: Where Jack’s Firehouse excels in space, London Grill makes up for in its home-y atmosphere. Jack’s has a larger selection of draft beers and London has pretty great food! But even with its massive bar, Jack’s never gets overly crowded a la some of the center city bars (unless it’s Halloween season) and I think that alone is admirable. For that, I tip my cap to Jack’s.
*insert dad joke about Jack’s Firehouse not being able to break fire code*
(4) Local 44 vs (13) Blarney Stone
John: Local 44 is constantly regarded as an underrated bar. Its location is not one that you would go out of your way to visit, but if you reside in West Philly, you’ve lucked out and have a great neighborhood bar in your area. As I said in my previous post, Blarney Stone is a true chameleon of a bar. You can go in there on a Wednesday night and busloads of St. Joe students will be taking over the bar. But you can also find yourself there on a Friday and it’s a much less aggravating night. As much as I would like for a (13) seed to take an upset here, the crowded nights probably hold back Blarney in this vote. Local 44 moves on.
(7) Crime and Punishment vs (15) Era
Quags: While these two bars are just blocks away from one another they are, in some ways, worlds apart. Era serves a good amount of cheaper and more typical booze, offering patrons a grimy yet appealing dive bar experience. Crime and Punishment serves all kinds of interesting beers that they make in house, offering a rugged but refined time for those who stop in.
Yet, they both represent Brewerytown well. They’ve both got some quality food choices. Era doubles as an Ethiopian restaurant, while C&P offers a wide variety of bar food and once gave our table, in place of a mixed bag of appetizers, a full plate of pickles. They were delicious.
Ultimately though, as I stated in round one, C&P is the future. Era is a fine establishment that keeps you coming back for that dive-bar experience, but there are far more dive bars than there are real, adventurous brewpubs.
(11) Landmark Americana vs (14) Cavs
Quags: Oh my gosh I can’t believe this matchup fell to me. What a time to be alive.
Landmark is sort of like if you took an Applebee’s, fed it acid for a few weeks, and dropped it into University City. People flock there for Quizzo, and their outdoor patio is a favorite for Drexel affiliates in the summer. It’s good enough, but it also feels like someone tried to design what they thought a restaurant is supposed to be. “A burger…and…uh….a huge banana split! OH! And $2 specials, some beer no one will order…uh…Narragansett! Yeah! And on Thursdays we’ll have BEER PONG TOURNAMENTS!”
Even the name, Landmark Americana. What does that mean? Is this place an American landmark? Is it just Landmark, and its food is “American”? What exactly is “American” food? Do they serve hot dogs? Is a hot dog a sandwich? I digress.
Cavs, meanwhile, is usually mostly empty but serves sneakily good food. Wings, burgers, anything that you might typically find at a sports bar. And then…on Thursdays…it explodes. Drexel students descend on the bar and fill it to the brim. There is a huge line. There is free (really, truly terrible but somehow still appealing) pizza. It’s absurd.
Any Drexel student has probably had their fair share of Cavs experiences, but what carries it to the Sweet 16 is not its prominence among that community, but the quality the place has when those people aren’t there. There’s a legitimate chance Cavs could be known for something like their food if Drexel students didn’t head there in droves every Thursday. Alas, at least we can honor it here. Cavs moves on.
The Center City Region
(Graduate Hospital, Rittenhouse, Chinatown)
(1) McGillin’s vs (9) Bru/U-Bahn
Quags: Generally, I have a distaste for places that get too crowded. Bru and U-Bahn, relatively new players, are routinely two of the most crowded bars in the city. They are located just an alleyway away from McGillin’s which, though legendary, is also typically very crowded. So everyone is crowded. Moot point.
Bru and U-Bahn serve a wide range of beers and have a pretty great selection of beverages you may not get elsewhere. McGillin’s doesn’t exactly thrive in that area, but it does fine, and it also has plenty of brews for cheap. I’m divided here as well, I like the selection at BrU-Bahn, but my wallet loves McGillin’s.
I think my decision here comes from something BrU-Bahn did recently. At one time, even on crowded weekend nights, you could flow freely between the two bars, which are connected by a flight of stairs and some internal doors. And then…they stopped allowing that. Then it became Bru, the German beer hall, or U-Bahn, the underground German dance club. Why the separation! That was a dumb move. Change it back. McGillin’s moves on.
(12) Smith’s vs (13) Oscar’s
John: Low Seed Battle. Yes, Oscar’s does give you a lot for your money…but IMO Smith’s still wins. As one of the only packed-houses I would vote for, Smith’s crowd is typically friendlier than most places — and I usually have a good time there. The downside, however is the line and the long wait for a beer, but it still hasn’t stopped me from going — although a lot less often in my older days.
(2) Franklin Mortgage vs (10) Harp and Crown
Quags: Harp and Crown sounds great in theory, but it loses a step for me in a key area. It looks fancy. The sign is fancy, the name is fancy, it all seems very fancy.
Here’s the thing about bowling: it is not fancy.
Franklin Mortgage is a place that sounds fancy and is fancy. It’s a place for fancy drinks where you’ll see people dressed up all fancy and accidentally getting super fancy drunk because there’s fancy absinthe in their fancy cocktail. No this is not from personal experience (yes it is).
Either way, I’m sure Harp and Crown is a fine place, but Franklin Mortgage is moving on.
(3) Drinker’s vs (6) Fieldhouse
John: As I’m sitting here listening to Preston and Steve live from the Fieldhouse, my answer seems to be more apparent. The Fieldhouse. They’re always having “events” and it’s slated as the local meet-up bar for a handful of transplanted college alumni fans to watch games. You’ll always be able to catch the game you want to see because they have a great amount of TV’s. Drinker’s has that too, but there is way more space and seating at Fieldhouse. The crowd at Drinker’s is also pretty consistently young where Fieldhouse can vary into a good mix.
The Hipster Region
(South Philly, NoLibs, Fishtown)
(1) Frankford Hall vs (8) Boot and Saddle
John: Damn. This one is tough because I am a sucker for live music, but since the birth of Frankford Hall, the number of open-air bars in Philly has skyrocketed. I know it’s not the first one ever, but IMO Frankford Hall is sort of a pioneer for cozy summer night drinking in Philly. Frankford Hall.
(4) Barcade vs (12) El Bar
John: Barcade is one of those gimmick bars that works so well. Growing up, my high school friends and I would drink in my parent’s garage where we had an old touch video game machine. We would drink an excessive amount of Miller Lite and play Photohunt for hours on end. Now, as an adult, Barcade makes this totally acceptable. Barcade.
(2) Garage vs (7) Bob and Barbara’s
Quags: Sure, both of these places are very popular Philly spots with unique spunk and appeal. At one, they invented the City-Wide and you can have a great time for cheap, and at the other you can BYO cheesesteak.
Actually, BYO cheesesteak is sort of a dumb reason for a place to beat out Bob and Barbara’s. It belongs in the Sweet 16, and it’s going.
(14) Murph’s vs (6) Pub on Passyunk East
Quags: I’m really struggling with this one, but the more I think about it the more I cannot truly justify putting Murph’s over POPE. I can’t bear to write any more about it.
We’ll always have Domino’s night, Murph’s. We’ll always have Domino’s night.
The Historic Region
(Old City, Society Hill)
(1) Buffalo Billiards vs (9) Olde Bar
Quags: I was discussing this tournament with a friend and he remarked that often, these match-ups give us two very different bars. That is certainly the case here. I could go to Buffalo Billiards in a hoody and sweatpants and feel at home, while and I could go to Olde Bar in a suit and fit right in.
But, there is a reasoning for choosing Buffalo Billiards, and it’s the one I outlined last round. It’s a Birthday Bar! It’s the kind of place you can go with a bunch of people and can be almost sure you’ll have a fine time. Olde Bar is fancy and intimate, but it’s fun-ceiling is low. I don’t know that many bars can compete with BB’s fun-ceiling. Look out for more on that in the Sweet 16.
(4) Spruce Street Harbor Park vs (5) Khyber Pass
John: Spruce Street Harbor Park has an immediate disadvantage since it’s only open for a few months of the year. While it hit its peak during The Pokemon Go era, if you’ve visited Spruce Street once, and Instagrammed it, you probably don’t need to go there that many more times after. Khyber has amazing food, and you basically need to eat everything on the menu; so you’ll need to go there 50+ times! Khyber.
Quags: While I am shocked and upset by this, I understand the logic. SSHP goes down early!!
(2) Morgan’s Pier vs (10) 2nd Story Brewing Company
John: Morgan’s Pier has that seasonal handicap too, but they crush it during that season. 2nd Story is still relatively new and has not been tested long enough to take this victory. With the lifespan of a bar this short, especially in the Old City area, it’s hard for me to see 2nd Story Brewing Co. outlast Morgan’s Pier in real life, so we’ll give this to Morgan’s.
(3) Independence Beer Garden vs (6) The Plough & The Stars
Quags: I think that when they made The Plough & The Stars, they were hoping to become a destination of sorts. “Look,” they said, at the meeting you have in the place where you’re going to have your bar and restaurant, when you’re just starting to build it, “look at the cool balcony! People will be up there, and down here on the dance floor. We’ll keep the booths in, but we’ll move all the tables out at night! It’ll be a unique, classy, Old City place to be!”
The problem is, the college kids found it. The other problem is, its name is too long, and so people just say “Plough” as in “we’re going to plough” or “Bruh get the Uber man we’ll split it we’re gonna drink our faces off at Plough and Vanessa is gonna be there! Dude…Vanessa!!!!”
Of course, all of that is sort of irrelevant because it’s going up against IBG, which despite being consistently crowded at basically all hours of the day ever since it’s been open, is still hard to say something bad about. Sometimes they make you order from a waitress if you’re sitting at a table? That’s sort of annoying, but that’s all I can come up with. IBG to round 3.
That’s it for round 2! Let us know what you think! Since we’re down to just 16 bars, we’ll be diving into each match-up a bit more, and we’ll likely be asking for some reader participation. Keep an eye out on Twitter and Facebook!
