The X-Files: Well, That Happened
Season 11, Episode 3
After last week, my faith in season 11 was restored. The bar is still low, because duh (reminder: I’m a harsh judge of reboots). Tonight’s episode was written by the man some believe to be Satan, Chris Carter, but it was actually…great? It was one of the best episodes since season seven, honestly.
If you need a refresher on the season 11 premiere or were too wary to even watch, check out my thoughts here. For my thoughts on last week’s episode, go here.
The Wig Files
Here I will check in on Gillian Anderson’s Scully wig and see how it’s doing. Her season 10 wig was lackluster, but based on promos and behind the scenes photos, the season 11 wigs seem to be much better.
The wig looks fabulous. Long hair suits her. And it even looks good post-hookup, which leads me to…
Shipper Moment
A good 50% of The X-Files is wondering when Mulder and Scully will finally kiss and make-up. The show’s creator, Chris Carter, is notorious for insisting that despite having a child together and sharing a few on-screen kisses, Mulder and Scully are platonic. Obviously he’s wrong. This section will track the progress made on the MSR (Mulder Scully Relationship) front.
The promo showed Mulder and Scully spooning, so to say I was going in on the edge of my seat would be an understatement.
They totally boned, y’all. We didn’t get to see a kiss, but I don’t care (that’s a lie, I care a little), because Mulder and Scully slept together. After Scully went into Mulder’s room and pouted because she couldn’t sleep, asked him to hold her (I died), they had a conversation about getting older and maybe having families with other people and what they would do if they lost their jobs at the FBI…turns out, the answer is each other. If they lose their jobs at the FBI, they’re just gonna bang. It’s confirmed.
The fact that Scully even asked Mulder if they would spend time together after they retire is crazy to me. You two can’t go more than a few days without seeing each other, you’ve been through hell together, you had a child together and lived together for like 10 years. Your relationship is clearly more than platonic co-workers.
Okay, back to the sex: Mulder literally smiles at himself in the mirror, like a “I just had sex with my beautiful partner who is not-so-secretly the love of my life,” smile, then freaks out because he sees his doppleganger and rushes back into the room, where Scully is still sleeping, and tells her to wake up and get dressed. And then she begs him to come back to bed and sits up a bit to reveal her naked shoulder (I died again). At this point, it’s clear what happened. But in case it wasn’t, Mulder then says:
“Put a dimmer on that afterglow, Scully.”
!!! (I’m dead. RIP Me. Gravestone shall read: “She actually got an episode where her ship got it on. And somehow, it was written by Chris Carter.”)
Best Line or Exchange of the Episode
Depending on who wrote it, an episode of The X-Files can contain quite a few gems. The 10 seasons and 2 movies we’ve had before this point have given us iconic one-liners like “Mushrooms taste great on burgers, Mulder, but they don’t raise the dead,” and “Please explain to be the scientific nature of a whammy.” What does season 11 have in store?
Scully: “If you eliminate the possible, whatever is remaining, however improbable, must be the truth.”
Mulder: “No sugar, Sherlock.”
Cheesy, but cute. Oh, and of course the “afterglow” line is the best singular line.
Honorable mention: Mulder telling Scully,“You’ve still got it going on… you’ve still got some scoot in your boot.” when she asks if he thinks she’s old. Be still, my heart. Also, Scully, you’re immortal, remember? So don’t worry about it.
Monster Mash
How does this week’s monster square up against the rest of X-Files canon? Mulder and Scully have seen some wild creatures over the years, from the Flukeman to clones to evil dolls. Season 10 didn’t have any strong monsters, so hopefully season 11 will rectify that.
At first, it seemed this week centered around doppelgangers/evil twins, but in the end it was just one set of evil twins: Chucky and Judy. Serious praise is in order for Karin Konoval, who played both twins. If you don’t recognize her, I’ll help you out: she played the deformed mother living under a bed in the season 4 episode “Home.”
The twins who play hangman could have been hacky, and god knows The X-Files has done “evil twins” before — multiple times — but this story was executed very well. I don’t blame Scully for feeling unsettled. It’s extra creepy when we see at the end that they killed their parents (the “mom” and “dad” hangman cards are shown in Chucky’s house after Mulder finds his body).
Chucky and Judy are definitely the best “monster” of seasons 10 and 11 combined so far. These cases are the kinds the OG series thrived on, so it was about time they returned.
The Bat-Crap Crazy Corner
This section will track the craziest thing Mulder reveals his belief in this week — and the dude believes in almost anything, no matter how many times Scully rolls her eyes.
Ghosts, but we all knew Mulder believed in those. He also immediately believed in doppelgangers, because his sweet little soul just wants to believe. It’s misguided, but cute.
William Dollar Baby
To those unfamiliar, William is the son Scully conceived despite believing she was barren after aliens conducted tests on her and took out her ova (I know, it sounds crazy). Mulder is his father and you can’t make me believe otherwise.
His name wasn’t mentioned, but the miracle of his birth was. When Mulder and Scully are talking about kids, Scully admits that she wanted a second child, but it’s now too late and the first one was a miracle. It still breaks my heart every time I remember that she didn’t get to raise William, the miracle baby she wanted so badly.
Basement Analysis
I’m just gonna rant and overanalyze like Mulder does down in the basement.
Congrats on the sex, Mulder and Scully. I still cannot believe that scene. AND the last scene of the episode, when Mulder pretends the hours he’s referring to are hours of sleep, not snuggling, and Scully pretends like she has no reason to need Mulder. And then basically giggles to herself as she swings open their suite door to find Mulder already waiting for her. Ah yes. This is how I like my MSR.
Like Mulder says in the beginning of the episode, they really are back to their bread and butter. Solving weird cases and pretending like they don’t want to jump each other constantly. Although clearly that second part is no longer an issue.
Over-dookie-ing It
I never want to hear the word “dookie” again. Can they not say “shit” on Fox? Or at the very least could they have used “feces”? Or just not said it so many times?? Because I rewound, I caught that what Little Judy flung at Scully was not her own feces, but chocolate pudding called Dookie, but that wasn’t immediately clear.
Cue the Creepy Music in 3…2…1…
The scoring and music really enhanced this episode! The creepy music with notes from the theme song made everything even spookier than it already was. Bravo to the sound people.
Also, it wasn’t creepy, but FUN FACT: the song the punk band is playing in the opening scene is actually one of David Duchovny’s songs, “Unsaid Undone.” Chris Carter surprised him by having a local punk band cover it. I’m not a big fan of Duchovny’s music, but that’s a cool easter egg.
Retirement?
Okay, I’m gonna keep coming back to this. Mulder and Scully have been inseparable for 25 years, why would she even be a little concerned that they wouldn’t spend time together when they inevitably retire? She also literally asked that question while he was spooning her. Geez. They’re practically married, that won’t just change overnight. Plus, they literally have no other friends and haven’t dated anyone since they met.
I’ve said it many times before and I’ll say it again: If Mulder and Scully are platonic co-workers and nothing more then I’m a heterosexual MENSA genius and billionaire (and I’m not even close to any of those things).
