The Uber Confessionals

The Ex

After learning that I work with computers, my driver shifts his line of questioning towards how someone might get something pulled from the internet. Apparently his ex-girlfriend posted some scandalous stuff about him on a website geared towards exposing rip-offs and he’s been trying to scrub his reputation clean…

Letter from the Editor

What started off as a pet project has gained over a thousand followers over the past few months. I’m guessing The Uber Confessionals’ rise in readership is probably due to the headlines Uber’s been grabbing recently, for better or for worse (mostly worse). Or it could be some cheap…

The Actor

My driver stares intently at me as I get in, greeting me with a smile. Her long, ginger-brown hair is tied into a high ponytail. Black shirt, blue jeans, completed by fire-red nikes that show themselves every time she steps on the brake. There’s a note formatted like a screenplay in front of me, tied to the…

The Historian

I’m greeted by a stocky Latino driver wearing a high-collared quarter-zip sweatshirt and a driver’s cap. He proceeds to point out all of the amenities inside his vehicle as I fumble with the seatbelt. His tone carries an air of unshakeable politeness, and he ends nearly every answer to my questions with…

The Bouncer

It was Valentine’s Day, or Night, since his car arrived around 9pm. I was headed to the Hop Louie in Chinatown to meet a friend for some drinks. A 5-Series Beemer rolls up to me and I reach for the door handle. It’s locked. The driver lowers the back window two inches and asks for my name. I pause for a…

The Optimist

I’m standing beside my dad in front of the international terminal at LAX. We’ve just wished a friend farewell and are heading to Griffith Park for an afternoon hike. Our ride stops sharply at the curb and upon entering the vehicle we’re greeted with a booming

AAAALOHA!

The Tesla

I need a ride to the New Beverly Cinema for a date but make the rookie mistake of waiting too long to call an Uber. The fare has risen to $23 and causes me an intense bout of bourgeois distress, but I manage to regain my composure when a cherry Tesla Model S shows up in front of my house. This would be my…

The Vegetarian

I’m in a neighborhood on the border of North Hollywood and Glendale. Behind me is a cactus two stories tall. I can’t recall the car, but the driver was a chiseled, white male with shoulder-length blonde hair wearing a quality flannel. He would have easily been someone’s dream hunk in a past decade. He…

The Hustler

I’m standing in front of Culver City’s city hall when a white compact swings in front of me. I get in, greeted by a heavy-set, black woman named Sonia, who starts making conversation in small pieces. I’m distracted, trying to make sense of evening plans on my phone. She informs me that her windows are…