Campus Crush Confessions Part Three: Teammate Betrayal
By Abby Hansen
Welcome back to Campus Crush Confessions! This edition focuses on another common theme I saw with many of your submissions (no, it’s not Lomu again). A lot of y’all are crushing on people you really shouldn’t be! Whether it’s your teammate’s girlfriend, boyfriend’s teammate, or ex’s friend, I’m judging you all the same.
To: Abbie Klusman
What your secret admirer likes about you: “It’s so cute the way she hates fruit and cheese. She is also so funny and goofy. Abbie, I think I am falling in love with you.”
How your admirer knows you: “We both play soccer”
What’s stopping them from asking you out: “My teammate is her boyfriend:/“
From: “Secret Admirer”
I’m going to be honest: I have a feeling this one is fake. Saying, “I think I am falling in love with you,” is pretty insane, but we have definitely heard crazier confessions. If this is real… get it together! That’s your teammate’s girlfriend!
To: Rey Casado
What your secret admirer likes about you: “He’s just so mysterious”
How your admirer knows you: “I found his sister on facebook”
What’s stopping them from asking you out: “I’m in a relationship with one of his teammates”
From: “The girl about to be single again”
Girl, you’re the problem. Maybe stay single for a while and work on not being the worst :)
I wish you the best, though!
To: Ellie Patterson
What your secret admirer likes about you: “How positive she is on her wolax team. She also makes really good Carmel popcorn haha”
How your admirer knows you: “Her boyfriend is my teammate”
What’s stopping them from asking you out: “Idk yet I met her for the first time yesterday”
From: “The mysterious man from the bonfire”
First, it’s caramel, not “Carmel.” Second, you mean to tell me you met her once and decided you’d be willing to betray your teammate like that? Maybe have a conversation with the woman before you try to sabotage her relationship. You’re not mysterious; you’re a wannabe home-wrecker.
I do want that popcorn recipe, though.
To: Kenzie Poulsen
What your secret admirer likes about you: “She’s so beautiful and so elegant on the field playing lacrosse. Let’s watch La La Land sometime!”
How your admirer knows you: “We both really like the Emperors New Grove”
What’s stopping them from asking you out: “My friend on the men’s soccer team is also really into her”
From: “Crossover episode”
Here’s a fun story… When my parents were in college, my mom only knew my dad because her roommate had a massive crush on him. And now they’ve been married for over 26 years, so… go for it? (Sorry, Mom!)
To: [REDACTED]
What your secret admirer likes about you: “tall dark and handsome. do i need to say more??”
How your admirer knows you: “my ex knew you”
What’s stopping them from asking you out: “how do you feel about bro code?”
From: “your friends ex”
We’ve been blessed with a follow-up for this submission! Scroll down to see how this secret admirer’s confession went.
To: “hi i put one about [REDACTED] and i ended up asking him out and it didnt go well so pls do NOT post that one”
What your secret admirer likes about you: “apparently he had a girl”
What’s stopping them from asking you out: “i did”
From: “i embarrassed myself fr”
I know you asked me not to post these, but it was too funny not to. Here is a prime example of why you don’t mess with “bro code” (and don’t say anything about my mom; that was different).
I’m sorry you embarrassed yourself, “fr,” and I’m sorry for making your embarrassment available for everyone to read.
Maybe don’t go for your ex’s friend next time. Good luck!
That’s it for part three! If you missed part one or two, click on the links below:
Campus Crush Confessions: Part One
Campus Crush Confessions Part Two: Everybody Likes…the Same Guy?
We are still taking submissions for Campus Crush Confessions; click here for the form.
Check back next week for another edition of Campus Crush Confessions!
