Kara Panzer – Medium

Kara Panzer

Kara Panzer
in
Greener Pastures Magazine

The Barbie Monologue, in Other Movies

It’s impossible to be

2 min read4 days ago

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2

The Barbie Monologue, in Other Movies

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2

Kara Panzer
in
Slackjaw

My Life As The Leading Lady In A 2004 RomCom

I couldn’t help but wonder: can brunettes find love?

5 min readJun 7, 2024

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9

My Life As The Leading Lady In A 2004 RomCom

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9

Kara Panzer
in
The Belladonna Comedy

Brand Guidelines for the Second Coming

Our consultants have provided essential feedback on Christ (our brand)

3 min readJun 5, 2024

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14

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14

Kara Panzer
in
The Haven

I Am Uniquely Qualified To Hold This Senate Seat

Because I’m dead

5 min readMay 6, 2024

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I Am Uniquely Qualified To Hold This Senate Seat

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Kara Panzer

A Line In The Coffee Grounds

A debate rages in my hometown… over which way to queue at the coffee shop

4 min readMay 1, 2024

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A Line In The Coffee Grounds

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Kara Panzer
in
Greener Pastures Magazine

Why We, The Staff At Happy Paws Animal Shelter, Concealed The Fact That Your New Dog Is A Republican

We believe all dogs deserve a loving home. Even conservative ones.

3 min readApr 23, 2024

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Why We, The Staff At Happy Paws Animal Shelter, Concealed The Fact That Your New Dog Is A Republican

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Kara Panzer
in
The Belladonna Comedy

I’m Married to the Lead Detective on This Show

He’s about to stop a serial killer from brutally murdering every woman in our town. I’m about to call him 10–15 more times and ask him to…

4 min readApr 1, 2024

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22

I’m Married to the Lead Detective on This Show

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22

Kara Panzer
in
The Belladonna Comedy

Oops! I lied on my resume and now I’m writing art placards at the Met

The interplay of light and shadows across the naked body of the woman tells me Manet was a perv.

3 min readFeb 16, 2024

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8

Oops! I lied on my resume and now I’m writing art placards at the Met

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8

Kara Panzer

Kara Panzer

Your mom likes my satire. Words in Points in Case, Slackjaw, Defenestration, Weekly Humorist, the Belladonna, the Satirist etc. Follow for more!

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