From the desk of Rod Stewart November 22, 1984 Dear Bono, I haven’t seen you since Billy Idol’s Easter Sunday brunch, and you left before Ozzy tried to eat Elton’s Fabergé eggs. So I’d love to knock about with you, Boy George, and Kool and his whole gang, singing about famine in Ethiopia and doing blow…

I’m the world’s greatest detective, and tonight I’ll be doing the Hamlet. — Here I find myself, snowed in at a Rocky Mountain chateau with seven total strangers: an aging socialite, a Russian cosmonaut and likely KGB agent, his mistress (also an acclaimed Bolshoi ballerina), the world’s second-greatest jewel thief, a Texarkana oil baron with a bounty on his head, a seductive Czech…

This swarm of 500,000 bees we released at the airport will detect narcotics any minute now! —

Become a better you without the hassle of actually reading a book! You want to self-improve right now, so don’t waste time reading books! I skimmed a bunch of self-help books in the bathroom at Barnes and Noble and summarized their main message. You can trust my summaries, because I’m…

Angry clouds gathered at the big tree house down a sunny dirt road deep in Bear Country. Clouds that looked like marital strife.

Some of us can still separate an artist and his art. — No one cares more about the #MeToo movement than me. I even tweeted at Alyssa Milano once. As a bona fide supporter of #MeToo, I feel deeply for Kevin Spacey’s victims, especially that one guy, I think his name is Tommy or maybe Tristan, who got famous by starring in…