Should I feel guilty for Starting Another Family?
Should I feel guilty if she is from another race?
Well, I don’t. Let me start by saying, I believe we get race and culture mixed up. Since I parted ways with my ex-wife I have never been more happy, especially since child support ended. It feels as though I’ve won the lottery, a second chance at life. Toby is free! Can you imagine not having to pay child support for four kids anymore? OMG! First, I got my passport and became a traveler, a passport bro. I did the whole self-evaluation and realized that that is where I was. I had unresolved issues with my parents. We attract likeness. I got married with the issues I had with my family. I married the issues she had with her family, her past relationships that didn’t work, and the relationship she had with her parents, specifically her biological father.
There was not a harsh break-up, but the fact that I am doing better does not sit well with my children for some reason, especially since child support ended and their mom is now struggling. My door is always open to them, but they mostly choose not to come around much, and I stop asking. I know it has something to do with the way their mother feels about me and her situation. I know this is true because when I communicate with them they parrot things their mother would say to me. Things like, “You are not generous enough with your money, Why don’t you come to see us, When you get a girlfriend you act differently, and you spend more time with your girlfriend than you do with us”. My daughter told me that she feels as though one day a female is going to replace her.
I was one of those fathers who paid child support and was told I still couldn’t see my children at times. I never missed a birthday party, game, or graduation. I coached them all in little league sports. I felt the pain of Chris Rock when he said, “Only Women, Children, and Dogs are loved Unconditionally. A man is only loved under the condition that he provides something.” I would get a phone call when one of them would get kicked out of school for doing drugs, selling drugs, or fighting. That made it look as though I was the bad cop and Mom was the good cop. I would get a call when there was unwanted company in Mom’s house, time and time again. At times she would tell me things they were doing and then say don’t tell them I told you because I don’t want them to be mad at me. WTF! Oh, but it’s okay for them to be mad at me. Now this is what we are left with as adults. I know that when I come around they avoid me for being embarrassed because they still live with mom and they are not happy with where they are in life.
70% to 80% of inmates come from single-mother homes. Prisons profit 74 billion dollars a year. Is this just a coincidence? I think not. This is our culture, this is a constructed system and for some odd reason, we can’t break free of it. Mothers teach love, while fathers teach survival. Single fathers produce similar statistics to those of homes with two parents. The key to keeping our children out of prison is the father. But Mothers are awarded custody 90% of the time. Women are incentivized to have babies out of wedlock and to leave relationships where there are children involved.
My issue is that my kids still view me as they were taught, so reach out to Dad when you need something. However, the bank is now closed, and that has created another issue. No more loans, no more bailing out of jail or other situations that they get themselves into, because they are never paid back and how else will they be able to stand on their own? If I continue to bail them out of situations, that makes me an enabler. I mentioned to them how it feels to be called only when they need something.
No matter what devastations a mother may have caused in her children’s lives or how ill she spoke of their father, she can still do no wrong. She’s the victim of circumstances. That’s unconditional love. Is unconditional love healthy? Being loved as a child without conditions is one of many causes of most failed relationships when becoming an adult, work and personal. Life has conditions. Healthy relationships come with conditions. And it is hard for them to view me any other way than how they were taught. Now Mom is struggling and to them, it looks like it is my fault.
Am I turning my back on my race?
If race is referring to skin color, there are Black and Brown people all over the world. Many of them too have experienced colonization. I love the many shades of people that come from Black, this includes Caucasians. Caucasians are not the same as White people. The term White represents an evil superior mindset that seeks to conquer and destroy.
We are not bound to a race, culture, street, city, state, or country. We don’t own or owe them anything. We’ve been taught to claim a race as color, a religion as a way of life, a city that seeks to put us behind bars, and a political party that is not for the people. We are taught to fight for a country that does not fight for us. It’s time to break the chains. This is not a Black issue. This is an American issue.
As far as turning my back on my race, it is not the race I’m turning my back on, it’s the American culture. Colonizers created the Black culture in the U.S. It is filled with pain, a ton of lies, and deceptions, starting with Christianity. There will never be a White European man, with blonde hair and blue eyes coming to save us. Christianity and government assistance replaced the father in our homes. The pimps in the pulpit told our women that all they needed was Jesus. Now our children are domestic terrorists. The places with the most single mothers have the worst crime as they are calling the police on each other’s children.
What is Black and White? Africans come from Africa. Indians come from India. Mexicans come from Mexico. Filipinos come from the Philippines. Japanese come from Japan. Italians come from Italy. Jamaicans come from Jamaica. Where does Black and White come from? It comes from White people. It is White people who created the American culture approximately 400 years ago. I am turning my back on the culture.
The majority of us have been brainwashed and made to feel lesser because of the color of our skin. We have been taught a religion that keeps us stagnant while others take advantage of our gifts and talents. We’ve been taught to hate ourselves and kill ourselves, and our family members and friends. We operate with a victim’s mentality.
Do you believe any of this could be the cause of broken homes, drug addiction, or mental illness? We don’t need therapy, we need the truth. The effects of slavery do not just have consequences and repercussions for Black people.
For more thought-provoking content, go to Gregorybjackson.com, leave a comment, and pick up a copy of my book, The Manual of Man, Spiritual Philosophy.
