“Please rate your pain from 1 to 10”

The problem with measuring someone else’s pain for them

Doctors often ask patients to rate their pain on a scale from 1 to 10 for at least two reasons.

Up close and personal

How we can close the gap between hate and empathy

In the United States, it’s easy (and even applauded in some contexts) to hate a group of people such as Democrats, Republicans, immigrants, Muslims, LGTBQ, and the list keeps going.

The tension of empathy

Empathy is listening and understanding instead of rushing to solve the problem.

Empathy is sitting in silence with someone when you’d rather chat about anything just to fill the void.

Bravery — the courage to change

Real talk about my fear of changing

“I’m afraid I’ll have to change once I truly see them and understand their perspective.”

Who’s right and who’s wrong?

Rethinking how we approach conflict

Rarely does declaring (or, more likely, arguing over) who’s right and who’s wrong help to resolve conflict or create positive change.

Connectivity — visualizing our connections and how we contribute to them

The four general types of…

Real talk on the risk and reward of vulnerability

How one question changed my perception of vulnerability

The pain was deep. I feared that opening up even one more time would hurt too much. I felt raw and vulnerable and weak.

Who am I?

The prerequisite to empathy

My two-and-a-half-month old son loves to chat with his friend in the mirror, not realizing the person staring back is actually himself. He hasn’t yet developed the self-awareness to recognize himself.