Write under the influence

A sober writer is a pretentious writer

Breaking Wind and Pride

It Happened to Me

So I farted in yoga. I did it, it happened. Anyone who has ever done yoga has feared this moment. I’d even bet that anyone who’s even thought about trying yoga has thought about it, and feared it.

My First Kiss Was A Goddamn Fairytale

I was almost fifteen, and my parents decided to take my sister and I on a cruise. Now, at fourteen-and-a-half I still had braces, I still didn’t have contacts, and I’m not totally positive that my mom was letting me shave my legs or armpits yet.