abuse

let me tell you what abuse is
abuse is when you think straight
you say things you really mean
not because you’re drugged or drunk
but because this is just who you
truly are; who you really are
abuse happens when there is no excuse
you just happen to be that person
cold and wet and windy
very late and very seldom…

a girl in a book

i was at a bookshop
a week ago
tiny little bookshop
in the middle of nowhere
i rambled through the store
looking for nothing in particular
and then my feet stopped
my movements halted
my hand reached out for
a tiny little book
a classic, obviously
im not that much into modern prose
until it’s…

idea

you ever had an idea 
but it was so shapeless
barely tangible
so fragile amorphous
feeblish and delicate
that there was no way
you could touch it
write about it
or even live it
live through it
live the experience
because that’s
just an idea, right?
if you know what i mean
then you know
what love truly is
an idea…

someone else’s wife

the beautiful and the ugly

girls pushing strollers against

the bitter russian snow

asking questions so stupid it hurts

capitalists

psychological propensity
to huminize the machine
to anthropomorphize 
the closer 
to the real brain the better
people are funny creatures
call themselves pacesetters
influencers
trendsetters
reading newsletters
and sending papers and letters
to loved ones
instead of coming and seeing them
interacting with…

wow, life

life — incredible
every time i wake up
i think, wow, another day
another dawn and sunrise
another lunch
another day at work
another twitter feed
wow, life
something new to read
probably smoke too
weed 
or a pure fucking cigarette
that works too
actually that works pretty well
even better
wow, life
i keep you…

pretty boy

whats up you pretty one

when’s home? have a few minutes to chat?

well see my husband is upstairs

and you’re

one of his best mates, so probably we shouldn’t really chat, shall we?

russia

russia — a middle of nowhere

i wish i could spend my money on study

yet — divorce, taking all my money

russia — a middle of nowhere

shopping malls everywhere

unpoetic poem

i’ve been feeling
extremely unpoetic
for the past few days
i had ups and downs
mostly downs though
nervous breakdowns
and nervous updowns
if there’s any such thing
there were times
i lost the ground
and said yes to stuff
i’d normally refuse
and say no to
and tonite i woke up
at 4 am
and for some odd…

new year

the darkness fell

with cavernous shadows

beneath the starless sky

the snow fell silently

minutely

chiming slightly