The X-Files: Out Squatchin’
Season 11, Episode 4
Tonight was a Darin Morgan episode! Maybe one of the best X-Files writers ever has come to continue the streak of good episodes! Hallelujah! “The Lost Art of Forehead Sweat” was almost like a sequel to one of Morgan’s most memorable episodes, “Jose Chung’s From Outer Space.”
If you need a refresher on the season 11 premiere or were too wary to even watch, check out my thoughts here. For my thoughts on previous episodes: 11x 02, 11x03.
The Wig Files
Here I will check in on Gillian Anderson’s Scully wig and see how it’s doing. Her season 10 wig was lackluster, but based on promos and behind the scenes photos, the season 11 wigs seem to be much better.
I finally nailed down what irked me so much about last season’s wig: it was so clearly a wig. It didn’t have any movement, it was always in perfectly tight waves and it looked like fake hair. Fortunately, this season, that is not the case anymore. Bravo, makeup department. This is the hair Dana Scully was meant to have post-iconic bob.
Shipper Moment
A good 50% of The X-Files is wondering when Mulder and Scully will finally kiss and make-up. The show’s creator, Chris Carter, is notorious for insisting that despite having a child together and sharing a few on-screen kisses, Mulder and Scully are platonic. Obviously he’s wrong. This section will track the progress made on the MSR (Mulder Scully Relationship) front.
This week, on “Mulder and Scully Are Basically Married…”
Mulder: “Do you even know me?!”
Scully (barely fazed): “Can we talk about this over dinner, please?”
Mulder standing Scully up because he’s gone down a rabbit hole, then dragging her on a stakeout and calling it a date is so classic X-Files. It’s almost like it’s 1996 again. Ah, the good ol’ days.
Best Line or Exchange of the Episode
Depending on who wrote it, an episode of The X-Files can contain quite a few gems. The 10 seasons and 2 movies we’ve had before this point have given us iconic one-liners like “Mushrooms taste great on burgers, Mulder, but they don’t raise the dead,” and “Please explain to be the scientific nature of a whammy.” What does season 11 have in store?
Scully: “…just the cherry flavor, the lemon-lime tasted like Leprechaun taint.”
Excuse me?! I have a feeling this was another Gillian Anderson ad-libbed line, because who else would sneak in the word “taint.” I choked on my water when she said it.
Honorable mention: “I’m Fox-freakin-Mulder, you punks!”
Monster Mash
How does this week’s monster square up against the rest of X-Files canon? Mulder and Scully have seen some wild creatures over the years, from the Flukeman to clones to evil dolls. Season 10 didn’t have any strong monsters, so hopefully season 11 will rectify that.
This week’s monster was…the truth? Fake news? An alien quoting Trump word for word? The sentiment that no one can tell the difference between real and fake anymore and everyone just believes what they want to isn’t inaccurate. Though this episode tried a little too hard to hit the nail our current political climate on the head, Dr. They wasn’t wrong. Even when clearly stated, no one takes facts at face value anymore. And when you think about it, that’s pretty scary.
The Bat-Crap Crazy Corner
This section will track the craziest thing Mulder reveals his belief in this week — and the dude believes in almost anything, no matter how many times Scully rolls her eyes.
Sasquatch and parallel universes, both things you would expect Mulder to believe in wholeheartedly. I love how Scully has gone from rolling her eyes when he does something wacky to either yelling at him or straight up just walking away/hanging up while he’s talking. She’s literally the human personification of the “F*ck This Shit I’m Out” song.
William Dollar Baby
To those unfamiliar, William is the son Scully conceived despite believing she was barren after aliens conducted tests on her and took out her ova (I know, it sounds crazy). Mulder is his father and you can’t make me believe otherwise.
No mention tonight. But I have a feeling we’ll be meeting him soon…
Basement Analysis
I’m just gonna rant and overanalyze like Mulder does down in the basement.
I’m gonna ask what we’re all thinking: is Mulder in the Berenstein or Berenstain universe?
Also, how disturbing was it to see fully-grown David Duchovny’s head on the body of a child?? I was very unsettled. He looks like a Mii.
Goop-O-What now?!
Ah, the Mandela effect. Trippy shit. I just love whoever comes up with these fake X-Files product names. Last season, the online search engine was called “Finder Spyder,” and this time, Jell-O is Goop-O ABC. Instead of Berenstein vs. Berenstain, it’s Wuzzle vs. Wussle. Gotta avoid that copyright infringement.
Easter Eggs For The True Fans
Mulder’s secret rendezvous signal, “Spotnitz Sanitarium” on the back of the mental institution van, Scully driving the car (because her feet can reach the pedals!), a Speedo-red convertible, sunflower seeds, Scully sitting at Mulder’s desk because she (still) doesn’t have her own, etc.
I Want To… Remember
I won’t lie, Scully’s final lines of the episode choked me up a bit. And not because she said “taint.” When she said “I want to remember how it was. I want to remember how it all was,” all I could think was that every X-Files episode (and movie) that came after the season 9 finale hasn’t been as good as what came before. When I think about the end of Mulder and Scully’s story, I want to believe they went on the run together and lived happily ever after. For me, the true ending of The X-Files was in 2002. That’s how it should be.
We Are All Mulder
There’s always a little part of most people that wants to believe in the impossible. We hold out hope for the slightest chance that just once, something will make sense or come true. Sweet, sweet Fox Mulder may be more intense about it than the rest of us, but in one respect he is on our level: fandom. When Mulder cannot find his favorite Twilight Zone episode, he proclaims that Reggie must be a “crazy person.” I’d say the same thing about someone if they insisted my favorite episode of The X-Files, “Arcadia,” didn’t exist (don’t worry, I triple-checked, it does).
Oh, and apparently Mulder is big into memes. Join the club, Foxy.
