Colin HeasleyinSlackjawWelcome To Your New Retail Job And Prepare To FIGHT!Adherence to these customer-service principles keeps our team fun, fashionable, and alive!Sep 18, 20191Sep 18, 20191
Colin HeasleyinSlackjawIf Only There Were A Way To Predict Mass Murders Besides Listening To The Women Who Warned UsThank you all for being here today. We are, of course, deeply saddened by this recent tragedy and wish things could have gone differently.Aug 7, 20192Aug 7, 20192
Colin HeasleyinSlackjawChapters From My Extremely True And Very Hardcore Series Of Wilderness Adventure NovelsWith only 500,000 miles to go, she pressed onward.Apr 25, 20191Apr 25, 20191
Colin HeasleyinSlackjawWhy We Can Fix The Economy By Flooding The Market With Remixes Of Kacey Musgraves’ Golden HourDance remixes to songs including ‘Lonely Weekend’ and ‘Rainbow’ will generate billions in revenue.Apr 7, 2019Apr 7, 2019
Colin HeasleyinSlackjawI Was A High-Achieving Middle-Schooler And Now I Work In This Piss-Scented Cat CaféGreetings fellow intellectual! I see that you’re requesting the academic discount.Mar 20, 20192Mar 20, 20192
Colin HeasleyinSlackjawClimate Change Projected To Drive Global Demand For FurbyAs the earth becomes increasingly uninhabitable, Furby has only become more and more interactive.Jan 31, 20193Jan 31, 20193
Colin HeasleyinSlackjawRules For Our Venue’s All-Inclusive, All-Night, Luxury New Year’s Eve PartyPlease join us at GARY’S FiDi for a night to remember as we close out the old year with a few hundred of our most dear acquaintances!Dec 28, 2018Dec 28, 2018
Colin HeasleyinSlackjawComments Gay People Receive At Family Gatherings And What They Really Mean“Who’s your friend?” I am in denial.Dec 17, 2018Dec 17, 2018
Colin HeasleyinSlackjawThings Not To Do At A Book SigningAsk the author to sign something random, like a 850 BCE Greek cremation urn or your offspring.Nov 5, 20185Nov 5, 20185
Colin HeasleyDeadly Nightshade Is Actually Good For You, According To Me, The Medieval Healer Who Accidentally…It clears the skin, like absorbing the sun’s rays.Oct 3, 2018Oct 3, 2018