PRIEST: I command you, spawn of Satan, to release this child in the name of God
[sprinkles it with hot dog water]
PRIEST: how do you feel?
[the little girl opens her eyes, wider, wider, and wider still. she begins…
JACKSONVILLE, FL — Local man Lester Cushanks (53) has offered free residence to…
[customer locks eyes with me] She grins as she pushes the bag of sugar off the top shelf.
“What are you gonna do about it” she asks.
I begin sweating nervously as she glides my direction.
Hey, diddle, diddle,
ME: where the hoes at
FARMER: they’ll be here
[the farmer’s son walks in and dumps a bunch of equipment on the floor]