‘Whenever I Feel My Faith Start To Waver, I Call Honus Wagner In Hell’: 5 Questions With Randy Lowden

An Oral History Of #LowdenBrosXmas

Everybody knows that Brandon Lowden and his father and brothers have a special way to celebrate December 23rd each year, but details about the event beyond cryptic tweets with the eponymous hashtag #LowdenBrosXmas have remained elusive for years. Now, for the first…

We Asked 22 U.S. Senators How They Celebrated Brandon Michael Lowden’s Birthday

1. Lisa Minkowski (R-AK) — “Who is that?”

Running Out Of Time: Brandon Lowden Has Only Two Years Left If He Wants To Die For Our Sins By The Same Age As Jesus

Culture Shock: Everything You Need To Know About “A Garfield Christmas”

“A Garfield Christmas” follows everyone’s favorite Monday-hating, lasagna-loving feline through a Christmas with his family. If you’ve never seen Garfield, Jon, and Odie celebrate Yuletide, use this primer…

Incredible! These Old Letters From Brandon’s Parents Describe How He Was Born

Brandon Michael Lowden turns 29 today, but who really knows how he came to be? These newly discovered letters from his parents before his birth provide some fascinating insight into the origins of…

MORE LIBERAL RACE-BAITING? Brandon Lowden Knows How To Pronounce Ta-Nehisi Coates’s Name

They Said What?! Find Out What Thorsten Integrity, Mandy Moore, and Mandy Patinkin Have To Say

How Well Do You Know The Lyrics To “We Three Kings?”

1. “We Three Kings, __________.”

a. Of…oh shit, it’s Matt Damon! We’d better hide behind the couch!

b. Brian, Kentavious, and Shitty Brian

How Well Do You Know The Lyrics To “With Arms Wide Open”?

1. “Well I just heard __________.”

a. Steve Buscemi farting in the living room

b. About the bird