Common sense is like X-ray vision.

Saying you have it gets you stabbed by people you wanted to have…

The one where I complain about grammar and wonder why I always lie to myself.

How I write so many timely think pieces.

Without being sarcastic even once.

Psychos have more fun.

Seriously, though, I’ve noticed that to have any real fun — any proper, big fun — you have to be a little psychotic…

Since we’re on the subject, can we just abolish all pointless holidays?

If there’s no themed snacks…