#139 Air Crash Investigation

It’s snowing heavily in Tallinn. We are waiting on the runway for our plane to be ready. It’s cold, but the three of us can handle the weather. I see huge machines cleaning the snow. I always have been extremely curious about airports and airplanes. My grandfather passed that on…

#127 Last week

Perhaps because of the end of the old year, I have been thinking about that last week. After Janne got the news on Tuesday that she had only a few hours or days to live, the doctor asked if I was staying overnight. We both said yes. Janne feared being alone, as I did (and do) too.

#130 To Build a Home

In the Summer of 2019, I noticed that one of the outside wooden columns seemed rotten. This house was built for rental…

#146 On borrowed time

One year ago, we made an impromptu trip to Lanzarote. The Canary Islands were our refuge. We didn’t hold back for this trip as we were living on borrowed time.

When Janne was diagnosed, she received a cutting-edge treatment. It wasn’t yet approved in Europe, but…

#144 Every little corner

I have the discipline to do the necessary stuff for myself and the boys. They haven’t missed a meal, a school day nor a moment without clean clothes. The same goes for me too. There are things I don’t negotiate with regardless of the mood I’m in. But the rest is difficult.

#128 Peace In This House

In June 2019, I watched an interview by Stephen Colbert. He was talking with Jessie Buckley, an Irish actress…

#129 Post Traumatic

Mike Shinoda has a new single out, a live recording of Already Over. If you don’t recognize his name, it’s likely you have…

#132 Sweet love

Take a banana, 150 grams or 6 ounces of “kohupiim” (a dairy product popular in Estonia called quark or curd in English), a handful…

#136 ABBA

Janne liked ABBA (who doesn’t like ABBA?). She probably loved them, but she was so subtle that she never expressed her strong preferences…

#142 Clothing

After Janne died, my main worries were if I would be able to cope with school and, believe it or not, if I could figure out clothes for the boys. For context, in Guatemala I had one pair of shoes and one set of clothes all year long. Here, you need clothes for rainy weather, for snowy days, for rainy…