Homepage
Open in app
Sign in
Get started
The Haven
A Place to Be Funny Without Being a Jerk
About
Yay Books!
Haven Animation
Clem Samson
Archives
Write/Support
School
Follow
FUNNY STUFF
Life Is A Puzzle That Can Only Be Solved With Intuition
Life Is A Puzzle That Can Only Be Solved With Intuition
There are limits to “reason” and rational thought.
Clem Samson
Jul 29
White House Plagued By PEI Hires
White House Plagued By PEI Hires
Privileged entitled idiots are destroying the country
Carlo Zeno
Jul 29
Satan Irked by Constant Need to Renovate Hell to Outdo Chaos on Earth
Satan Irked by Constant Need to Renovate Hell to Outdo Chaos on Earth
Every time you people start a war, I need to at least redecorate
John Corten
Jul 29
Anger
Anger
Whether or not you stay mad, is ultimately up to you
Vic Pinto
Jul 29
Drumpf Cashes in on Bandage Bonanza
Drumpf Cashes in on Bandage Bonanza
He and Jesus have a good thing going
Phillip T Stephens
Jul 28
You’re A True Chef If You Get Any Of These Cooking Questions Right
You’re A True Chef If You Get Any Of These Cooking Questions Right
Take our cooking expert quiz today!
Christine Stevens
Jul 28
A Piece of Quiet
A Piece of Quiet
For whom the doorbell tolls
Spyder Darling
Jul 28
“On the Wings of a Pig”
A flash fiction story
S.L. Neechski
Jul 27
One Man’s Lifetime Guarantee
One Man’s Lifetime Guarantee
Does anyone really know what it means
Brian Dickens Barrabee
Jul 27
Newly-Separated Male (61) Seeking Only Mature Women (20–25) With Super Hard Bodies
Newly-Separated Male (61) Seeking Only Mature Women (20–25) With Super Hard Bodies
It’s also okay if you’re 18 and have severe daddy issues
John Corten
Jul 27
How I Drank Two Diet Mountain Dews and Almost Joined The KKK
How I Drank Two Diet Mountain Dews and Almost Joined The KKK
Re-evaluating your life’s decisions, after watching the Republican Party speak.
Dan Dore
Jul 27
For Sentimental Reasons
For Sentimental Reasons
What should we do with the body?
Spyder Darling
Jul 27
Why Men’s Obsession with Big Boobs Is Making Women with Small Boobs Miserable
Why Men’s Obsession with Big Boobs Is Making Women with Small Boobs Miserable
I can’t stop staring at the boobs of the women with big boobs. They’re so big, and I’m so jealous.
Honorata Onanisma
Jul 27
Trump Calls for November Presidential Election to Be Cancelled, and He Be Declared Winner
Trump Calls for November Presidential Election to Be Cancelled, and He Be Declared Winner
“It’s a total waste of time — I can’t find anyone who isn’t going to vote for me!” Trump declares
Speaking Fiction To Power
Jul 27
Is Vance Risking His Neck For a Vice Presidential Role?
Is Vance Risking His Neck For a Vice Presidential Role?
Mike Pence hung in too long
Christopher Holdroyd
Jul 27
Bad Memory
Bad Memory
Thanks to those who don’t remember
Vic Pinto
Jul 27
Boarding Rules That Would Work Better than the Ones Currently Used by Airlines
Boarding Rules That Would Work Better than the Ones Currently Used by Airlines
Let’s change the world of travel together
Smillew Rahcuef
Jul 26
My friend stayed in a luxury hotel and he couldn’t sleep
My friend stayed in a luxury hotel and he couldn’t sleep
It’s his first time in such a hotel.
Pushpender Yadav
Jul 26
Interlude On The Upper West Side
Interlude On The Upper West Side
Oh the things you’ll find
Spyder Darling
Jul 26
I Am On The Long List of Possible VP Picks (And So Are You)
I Am On The Long List of Possible VP Picks (And So Are You)
And these are the top 10 items on my agenda when I take office.
Adam Overland
Jul 26
I Have My Own Events for a Senior Olympics
I Have My Own Events for a Senior Olympics
These days, I might need help getting up on the podium
Chris Raymond
Jul 26
This May Be The Most Beautiful Woman In The World
This May Be The Most Beautiful Woman In The World
But you’re going to have to wade through a lot of BS to get to see her.
Christine Stevens
Jul 26
Olympic Prize Winning Fools?
Olympic Prize Winning Fools?
Upon hearing the news that Breakdancing were to make its debut at the 2024 Summer Olympics, I’m sure I weren’t the only bod to think, “Well…
Fatchecker
Jul 26
Masked Palestinian Vows ‘Rivers of Blood’ at Paris Olympics
Masked Palestinian Vows ‘Rivers of Blood’ at Paris Olympics
Wait, these are the people Roger Waters and student protestors are lionizing? Something seems off.
Christine Stevens
Jul 25
Agree to Disagree
Agree to Disagree
Everything has its limits, even agreeing to disagree
Vic Pinto
Jul 25
Many Varieties of ghosts !
Horror is my favorite genre. I hate psychological horror. It is very stressful for me to read. I love pure horror. They help me sometimes…
Overthinking Unfiltered
Jul 25
JD Vance is a DFI Hire
JD Vance is a DFI Hire
And yes, Trump chose him because he’s a Dumb Fucking Idiot
Ross Rosenfeld
Jul 25
Men are Romantic; Women are Practical
Men are Romantic; Women are Practical
Warning, this post may contain explicit content attributed to male-centric thinkers
Brian Dickens Barrabee
Jul 24
Scientist Grows Male Genitals In A Lab
Scientist Grows Male Genitals In A Lab
Loses interest in dating
Christine Stevens
Jul 24
Use Forgiveness for Fun
Use Forgiveness for Fun
Otherwise, it’ll do you no favors.
Vic Pinto
Jul 24
About The Haven
Latest Stories
Archive
About Medium
Terms
Privacy
Teams