A Neighborhood Mom Asked My Wife If “the Rumors” of Our Lifestyle Are True. Lauren Didn’t Hold Back.
Their conversation revealed what Lauren and I already knew: Lots of wives are secretly unhappy with their monogamous sex lives and want more.
Reader note: The below recounts a conversation Lauren and another wife/mom had last summer at our neighborhood pool. This is based on how Lauren describes the conversation, which I mentioned in Part III of my “Confessions of a Swinger Husband” series.
“So, are the rumors true?”
That’s what a wife and mother we casually knew at the time asked Lauren last summer at the HOA pool. We’ll call her “Amy.” She’s in her late-30s, very attractive and a stay-at-home-mom.
Lauren and Amy had been chit-chatting, as moms at the neighborhood pool often do, and at some point Amy decided to broach the real reason why she struck up a conversation with my wife.
Lauren, looking quite good in her bikini, sunglasses and sun hat, stood in the four feet of water in stunned silence, processing how to answer Amy’s intrusive question. But, as she often does, Lauren smiled and found it within herself to maintain her composure and stay classy.
“What rumors?” Lauren asked, playing dumb.
“Just things going around — ”
“Such as?” my woman pressed, secretly unsurprised by Amy’s question because we already knew of the rumors but had decided to kind of not give a fuck about them after years of caring too much.
“Oh, you know…sex parties, swinging, another woman — a pretty redhead,” Amy, in a flattering one-piece swimsuit and also wearing a hat and sunglasses, responded nervously.
Lauren smiled and wanted to shake her head in disgust and tell Amy to mind her own fucking business but instead remained poised and decided to engage. In fact, she detected that Amy suddenly felt unsure of if her probing into another woman’s private life was a good idea after all, but she also sensed that Amy meant no harm.
“Yah, the rumors are true,” my wife, with her charming Swedish/American-English accent, confessed.
Amy looked on in stunned silence, and then responded with the only word that came to her mind:
“Really?”
Lauren nodded in the affirmative, noting to herself that Amy’s quite large nipples were now extremely hard and protruding through her swimsuit. She was either nervous or sexually aroused.
“How many guys have you done?”
“Hundreds,” Lauren replied, not batting an eye and feeling a tinge of defiance.
“And women?”
“Hundreds.”
“Like how many hundreds?”
“My husband says, for me, over 500.”
Amy looked impressed. Lauren had expected her to show repulsion. Lauren began to like Amy.
“And your husband?”
“Hundreds for him, too — all women” (Lauren didn’t disclose this one-time episode.)
“Sex parties?”
Lauren laughed at the notion of “sex parties” — a rather simplistic way to describe the lifestyle — but she decided to answer anyway.
“Yah.”
“Threesomes and swaps?”
“Oh yah. All the time.”
Amy came in closer to Lauren and lowered her voice.
“Multiple guys at ones?”
“That, too.”
“How many at once?”
“Anywhere from two to five. A few of the wives in our circle have had more.” (Note: At the time, Lauren hadn’t yet had the now-infamous 11-husband gangbang.)
“Oh my.”
“So I have to ask: What’s five at once like?”
“Messy. Rules required. Makes me super sore afterward. But fun.”
Amy stepped back and Lauren could see she was processing what she just heard.
“I can imagine two or three guys at once but not five. Mmmmm.”
Lauren giggled, unsure of if Amy liked the idea of five or found it a turn off.
“How does your husband deal with knowing five guys are — sorry to be blunt — fucking you?”
Lauren was a bit taken aback by Amy’s very direct question, but decided to give her some grace since she seemed genuinely interested and not judgmental. Plus, Lauren could see from Amy’s hard nipples that she found the topic quite stimulating.
“Well, usually he’s also participating. But what we do is equitable. He’s fucking lots of women, too.”
“And what’s the lifestyle overall like?”
“Exciting. Never a dull moment. Enjoyable. Adventurous.”
“Condoms?”
“With most, yes, they’re required. With couples we know well, not required.”
“How long have you been in it?”
“We got into it not long after we met.”
“And your sex life with your husband?”
“Wonderful. Always has been. We’re honest about what we want and aren’t afraid to explore it together. We don’t have an open marriage, though. This is all stuff we do together.”
Then Amy opened up about her own marriage. “I have to be honest,” she admitted. “Our sex life is so boring. I want more. You know?”
“More in what way?”
“I want him to take charge. Like really take charge. I want it more often, too. And, being totally honest, I want more than just him. Does that make me a slut? Doesn’t help that he has problems getting it up sometimes. We’re lucky to do it once a month. Boring, you know?”
“Oh, I know. That’s why my husband and I live the life we do. And it’s okay to be a slut. I am.”
“I think of being a slut as a bad thing. Anyway, I’ve never admitted any of this to anyone but you. I’m not sure why — ”
“I’m sorry your husband has difficulty with erections.”
“Does your husband ever have trouble getting it up?”
“Oh, no. Not at all. It’s easy for him. We’re fortunate in that regard. I’m sorry you have to experience that. Maybe encourage him to see a doctor about it?”
“It’s not all the time but I’ve told him he should get checked out.”
Lauren nodded reassuringly, feeling a connection with Amy. She appreciated Amy opening up to her.
“Can I ask a blunt question?”
“Go for it,” Lauren replied.
“Do you all have anal sex?”
“Yah.”
“I wanna try it but he won’t.”
“It’s not for everyone for sure. But if you ever try it, remember: lots of lube, relax, go easy, be sure you both want it.”
“Good advice,” Amy countered.
“Try an anal plug, my dear. We have a few and they’re wonderful. Just lube it up and slide it in. Feels really good, and you can even buy one from Amazon.”
“Oh my. I’ll try that. Wow, this conversation is getting me kind of hot,” Amy confessed, her nipples still extremely hard and her chest a bit flush.
Lauren giggled.
“And you have another woman, too?” Amy queried.
“We do. We’ve been with her for over four years.”
“Does your husband fuck her?”
“Yah. Most of the time it’s the three of us, though.”
“How do you navigate that without divorcing?”
“I really don’t know. We just do.”
“So you’re bisexual then?”
Lauren nodded in the affirmative.
Amy whispered. “I’m kind of curious about that.”
“Curious about other women, about non-monogamy, something else?”
“Honestly, all of those. But I’m really curious about other women. Have been since college actually. I’m also curious about the lifestyle you and your husband practice.”
“Ever considered telling your husband about your curiosities?”
Amy laughed. “He’d flip. He’d probably call me a whore. Please don’t take offense to that, by the way. I don’t mean any offense. I promise.”
Lauren giggled.
“But I think I’d like some of what you do…a lot of guys at once, swapping with other couples, another woman we could share and I could have, too. Sounds so fun.”
“It is.”
“You’re members of a club?”
“We are. It’s how we’ve met many other couples like us.”
Right then Amy’s daughter called to her.
“Well, I’d better go, but I appreciate your sharing with me. I won’t say a word. I promise. How about we meet for coffee soon and chat some more on this?”
“Of course. I’m happy to share more so long as it stays between us.”
Amy smiled. “Absolutely. I’d love to learn more. Maybe I should test the waters even if he doesn’t know….. Just don’t tell my husband, OK?”
“I think you should tell him.”
“Maybe I could test the waters with you and your husband.”
They laughed and kissed each other’s cheeks and then Amy attended to her daughter.
Continue to Part II
