Confessions of a Swinger Husband, Part III: Lauren and I Join the Swinger Lifestyle
We experience our first swap and love it so much that we decide to explore the world of swinging.
Continued from Part II
Not long after we had our son, Lauren and I entered the world of swinging without even realizing it.
It was early 2009 and the woman we were seeing at the time, Katie, then a 32-year-old wife and mother of two, asked us seemingly out of the blue if her husband, Rick, could join us in bed. Katie’s request confused us until she clarified her intentions: “Maybe we could swap?” (Note: The Katie I’m referring to here is different than this Katie.)
Swap? Hmmmmmm. After a lot of discussion and working through the major implications —both pro and con — of allowing Rick into what had been a fun, positive, low-drama and fulfilling three-way relationship with Katie, Lauren and I agreed to swap with them. We had one (naive) condition: It would be a one-time thing. Katie and Rick agreed.
Well, after some cold feet on the part of all four of us, the swap happened one Saturday night in a hotel room (a neutral setting) following dinner and a few glasses of wine. The two wives, naked and in bed with each other, engaged in foreplay before 69’ing. Then, my bride turned her attention to Rick. After she blew him, showing no shyness by this time, he fucked her — and I mean hammered her (turns out Katie had previously told her husband that Lauren likes it hard and deep)— before gratuitously slathering her breasts with his semen. For our part, Katie and I did much the same thing, only I blew the biggest load I could on her tongue and face to exert myself as the alpha male, which I managed to do.
It was stressful and exhilarating all at the same time — stressful because I didn’t know how I’d feel about seeing my wife enjoying another man (and watching him enjoy her), and exhilarating because it was so fucking naughty. The upshot? We loved it.
Turns out it wasn’t a one-time thing after all. The months to come brought more naughty fun with Katie and Rick, including not just swapping but also double-teaming each of the wives. The typical double-team scenario involved Lauren, for example, sucking my dick while Rick fucked her pussy. It didn’t take a lot of deciphering to see that Lauren loved being double-teamed and, like Katie, could confidently handle two guys at once.
At some point, Lauren and I realized we’d more than tiptoed into an exciting new world we wanted to explore — Katie was the first to call it “swinging.” First, we needed some ground rules to ensure what we desired individually and together wouldn’t foster jealousy and destroy our marriage. For starters, we both agreed that we would not have an open marriage. We learned about the differences between open marriage and swinging and didn’t feel comfortable at all with an open arrangement. What we’d do — swapping, group sex, etc.— we’d do together with some protective guardrails. So, we developed rules.
There was just one problem. We didn’t know the best way to meet couples interested in the same things. It’s not like you can walk up to a hot couple and ask if they’ll sleep with you and your spouse.
Later in 2009, after more swaps and foursomes with Katie and Rick, Lauren and I got on the internet to “research” how to meet other couples like us. By this point, our liaisons with Katie and Rick had tapered off as he had started to struggle with it all, though we continued to see Katie for a time (happily, they’re still married). From our “research,” Lauren and I learned about swingers clubs, which we’d both heard of, but we thought of them as seedy. We discovered two clubs not far from where we lived that purported to cater to a high-end clientele.
Shortly thereafter, we visited one of the clubs. Lauren wore a silky black dress with a very low cut, black hose, red pumps and no panties, and I had on a black suit and white shirt. She looked sensationally hot. We met a lot of couples and had plenty of opportunity, but we didn’t have sex with anyone else that first night. Instead, we had sex together in a room where other couples did the same. Turns out that was a smart decision — it helped us ease into the scene.
We loved the whole experience so much that we returned to the same club the next weekend and joined. That night, we swapped with another couple about our age (mid-30s) who we met in a semi-private room. It was a full swap and condoms were required, and we loved it and them.
Not long after, we joined the second club, too. In case you’re curious, the first club was/is large, plush and resort-like. The second club was/is smaller, a bit more boutique-like and more geared toward themed parties at couples’ houses.
Honestly, it was okay that Katie and Rick had fallen off the radar because Lauren and I discovered plenty of opportunity with other couples at both clubs. Wisely, I learned early on to follow Lauren’s lead and let opportunity at the club come to us — and it always did. As a tall, beautiful blonde with shapely breasts, a great ass, a perfect body and a Swedish accent, she got a lot of attention. Few women in the club turned heads the way Lauren did — and still does. Men and women alike wanted to “get to know” her. Happily, many women wanted to get to know me, too.
We had sex with virtually any couple or woman of our choosing. Some weekends, we hooked up with as many as five or six couples, occasionally for big group encounters. Lauren wasn’t the only ultra-hot woman at the club but she was among the most desired. So, any guy who had the chance to fuck her also gave me “the keys” to his wife. It’s not like I found myself on the losing end — I’ve had sex with some extremely hot women just as slutty as Lauren. We found swapping to be great fun.
In general, we played with couples who met specific criteria: married, at least college-educated, careers, fit and attractive, low-drama, fun, love of laughter, bisexual wife, drug-free and aligned with our rules. Happily, the club scene offered many couples meeting those criteria. Our criteria remain the same.
We loved and still love the lifestyle club scene. Because of what can happen in a club, we’ve always appreciated steps our clubs have taken to ensure privacy for all. We formed a lot of fun, lasting friendships with other couples because of the discreet, safe and plush, high-end environment our clubs offer. We eventually upgraded to the highest membership one can have at our primary club, affording lots of perks and benefits such as a private room. We got to know the staff well, too. Some of the staff are like family (no sex with staff allowed — strictly prohibited).
We embraced our club personas. Lauren bought risqué dresses (as in dresses a high-end call girl might wear), garter belts, thigh-high hose, slutty high heels and sexy jewelry and also said goodbye for good to her panties. She loved looking as hot, slutty and fuckable as she possibly could at our clubs. To this day, she still looks super sexy in her club dresses, all of which have one thing in common: They generously showcase her breasts.
We also attended parties at others’ houses and eventually hosted our first soiree in about 2011. Some of the huge milestones along the way: Lauren’s first times being double- and triple-penetrated, our first “orgy,” Lauren’s first gangbang (which was also my first since I was one of the guys), Lauren getting “blacked,” our first times alone (by ourselves) with other spouses and couples, and our first themed party. Some wild shit has happened along the way. At some point — and I don’t remember precisely when — we identified as “swingers.”
It wasn’t all rainbows and unicorns. We had challenges to work through. Early in our swinging days, while I was having sex with someone’s wife, I saw three husbands we knew having their way with Lauren. One was fucking her and she was taking turns blowing the other two as they played with her breasts. Then, I saw the two guys start to fuck her mouth. Eventually, they all came on her face and breasts, which got to me a bit because I could see how much Lauren loved it. I had to remind myself, though, that I had done much the same thing with their wives. I also had to remind myself that Lauren was/is my wife, but she’s also a sexual creature. For her part, she also got jealous now and then.
There was a period of norming that was hard for both of us. This was the age of the facial, and I saw a lot of guys, after drilling my wife or enjoying a blowjob, pump their seed all over her beautiful face, which bothered me for a time — but which Lauren didn’t mind at all. Yet I did the same with their brides. She struggled with anytime I went down on another woman, and yet she had/has had her pussy eaten by hundreds of men and women. There was a time of contradictions, but it was worth working through as a couple. We ultimately got to the place of not feeling threatened by swaps, group sex, gangbangs, oral sex, etc. Never was there a real question about our devotion to each other.
Still, we had some major missteps, including a few on my part that nearly wrecked everything. One of my indiscretions sent Lauren into a hotwifing tailspin and nearly caused us to leave the lifestyle and face marital ruin. With each misstep, we went back to our rules and reaffirmed them. We found a way forward because we were so deeply in love.
We have amended some of our rules over the years. We had a no-kissing rule that we kiboshed. Our no-anal sex rule also got 86'd. Recently, Lauren got gangbanged by 11 husbands (myself included), which we wouldn’t have allowed before but it’s a thing the wives in our circle are trying and Lauren wanted in.
These days, we have a circle of eleven other couples who we regularly swing with and know extremely well. We all get regularly tested for STDs. The benefit of the circle is that condoms aren’t required, but pulling out is.
We’re also always meeting and hooking up with new couples at our clubs, in which case condoms are required.
Rumors and disclosing
We eventually told a few people in our lives, including Lauren’s sister, about our lifestyle and Lauren’s bisexuality, and it helped relieve us of the “guilt” of our “double life.” In nearly every case, the people we opened up to were understanding and some quite curious. But I’ll admit it: We have at times felt some guilt over our marriage being totally at odds with puritanical norms on monogamy. The guilt comes and goes.
There are rumors in our neighborhood that we are swingers and there are whispers about the redheaded woman who is often at our house. That redheaded woman is Piper, our polyamorous lover since 2019. At one time, the rumors would have horrified us, but we really don’t care anymore. Recently, Lauren started wearing a necklace with an upside down pineapple charm. It’s her way of making light of the rumors.
Despite the rumors, she gets along well with many other moms in the neighborhood and we often gather with various families for wholesome fun. That said, one wife at our neighborhood pool last year cozied up to Lauren and asked her if the rumors were true.
“What rumors?” Lauren asked, playing dumb.
The other wife mentioned “sex parties,” “swinging” and “another woman.”
“Yah, they’re true,” Lauren said in her Swedish accent.
“How many guys have you done?”
“Hundreds.”
“And women?
“Hundreds.”
“And your husband?”
“Hundreds for him, too.”
The other wife’s reaction? She was jealous.
Lauren’s takeaway for her: “Let me know if you’d like to try out the lifestyle.”
Although we’ve come to the place of not giving a fuck about the rumors, we’re looking to move to a new house where we’ll have a bit more privacy. We don’t anticipate leaving the lifestyle anytime soon.
And why would we? We’ve hit our stride, are still in our primes and have a special “secret sauce” that keeps it all delish.
Wait, what’s the secret sauce?
Continue to Part IV
