Hello there Medium, I’m back! And yes, I’m still breathing.

Emotions are building up right now while I am typing. Seriously, I can feel a bit of moisture in my eyes.

Do you know the feeling when you find your way home after getting lost? It’s that kind of moment.

I have to write these few words today just to start writing again because it’s overwhelming.

This is me starting again!

You might be wondering, ‘Is that even possible?’ Of course, it is!

But how?

First of all, what is it that makes you lonely?

Is that a person, someone around you?

Did something happen in the past?

Or do you not even know why you feel lonely in the first place?

Let me tell you something about how I did it, and I hope it will help you too.

Examine yourself and your emotions.

Why do you feel lonely? When does it occur? Is there someone or something that triggers it?

Why do you feel lonely? — Back then, there was a time in my life when I felt the happiest. Well, ‘I thought so.’ Then there were betrayals, unreciprocated care or love, maybe. There were also failures I’ve encountered along the way, and I don’t want to count them.

I felt lonely because compared to the things I was giving, I was gaining nothing like I was nothing. It felt like that, and that’s when loneliness kept visiting me sometimes.

Then it got worse, and I felt that I was not enough. Nothing I did for me, or them was good enough. I’ve also lost confidence in myself and the smile I often carry.

I’ve forgotten my goals during that time.

When does it occur? — Loneliness crept me up mostly when I was alone and when I thought about what I was doing, which for them is like nothing. Another situation was when I longed for them, and they didn’t feel urgent to get back to me.

I was sharing my problems, but it was like nothing to them. You need a shoulder to lean on when you are at your lowest. But what if that person you thought would be there for you was gone? It sucked.

Is there someone or something that triggers it? — Yes, and after realizing it, I decided to do something for myself.

Let go

You know what, I never thought I would search online ‘how to let go?’. But I was desperate. I already realized my mental health was being affected by others, and it was myself that should control me.

As you get older, you will be more conscious of yourself. You will know how your mood and emotions work. And you will want to have a healthy mentality.

So, what should you do after learning the things and people that make you lonely? LET GO OF THEM.

Toxicity needs to be removed within ourselves.

I know it was a hard step. I’ve been trying to do it for years, but it was worth it!

I’ve let go of the toxins and found new people that support me, things that I love, and it is what I am doing now. I enjoy little things about myself and improving myself in things I’m good at.

Now I don’t rely on opinions from others I thought cared about me because they’re not. But I listen to people who want the best for me.

I also hope you can find those people. If not yet, there will be in the future.

Always look for that positivity.

Optimism? Yes.

I’ve gone and let go of my pessimism days.

Everything I do, every failure I encounter today, every negative happening in my life, and every people around me, I always try to look at their good side.

When I do things now, I only think of the good things they will bring me.

When a plan and a goal fail, I will try another path. There are always plans b, c, d, and so on.

When negative happenings surround me, I will think about how to turn it around. Everything doesn’t go how we want it, but you can still enjoy something now.

An example of this is what happened to me recently. I went and rode my brother’s motorcycle. Little did I know it was running out of gas. So, as expected, I had to walk home for 2km.

Along the way, I saw and met with people I barely saw and talked to. I enjoyed the beauty of the pinkish sky and setting sun while walking and had a good exercise😄

I always see now the bright side whenever some expected, and unexpected things happen. I enjoy them and learn more about what I should pay attention to at times.

So people are imperfect, and even if they try to do good things sometimes, it doesn’t seem right to others. I always try to understand their perspective and purpose in doing what they think is good.

Sometimes, it’s just that they can’t see their actions, but I don’t consider them bad. They have their good points. They just don’t know that some of their actions aren’t agreeable to others.

But since I am surrounded and closer to the people I chose now, there are more good sides to them, barely of bad sides.

Because I chose now who I want to be with, and I hope you will also, to promote your mental health.

Do not feel like you lose something if you must let go of that baggage; remember, they are heavy.

Feel free to explore more of my stories 😙

• My Path to Letting Go
• Life: A Lesson from the Past

So, Medium’s partner program is unavailable in my Country because Stripe is only available in 31 countries. Sadly, the Philippines is not on the list.

I was so excited to know about the update. There is no need to have 100 followers to apply to the Medium Partner Program by August! But I was wrong because it’s not for all.

It wasn’t very comforting, but I had nothing to do about it but continue writing my stories. It’s been over a week since I last worked on a topic.

I just had to decide whether to continue my membership or not.

I had to cancel my Medium membership.

I’m slightly disappointed, but I had to cancel my Medium membership for now.

Because I can only read a few stories in a day, I’m just busy right now trying anything. But it would have been a different story if I were part of the partner program. I may use the few cents to pay for the annual membership.

If not, I will have to explore and try more ways to get commissions while getting writing experience.

Trying anything to experience writing more.

Getting more writing experience means finding more ways and where to do it. Then right there, write!

I just built my first website, which you can visit, by the way, and tell me your feedback about it. I would love to hear it.

Then I am trying Fiverr right now, and I will see if I can get a client after publishing my first gig. It is a challenge and will help me in my writing journey, so I had to try this.

I will also send a pitch on my prospect guest posting websites. This will be a first-time experience because some will give me the credentials to publish a post on their websites.

For now, I want to broaden my writing environment and not stay where I am most comfortable. I will have to explore and continue to write to improve my writing skill and knowledge, so wish me the best. 😙

• Aspiring Writer: Taking on the First Big Step is a Life and Long Journey
• Embrace The Inexperience and Self-Worth

What is X is still trending.

I woke to find my Blue Bird but saw a black letter X instead. It was replaced by an X!

Without a doubt, I was not the only one taken aback by the update, and I’m right considering that it’s still trending. Even though I had heard discussions about it beforehand. Nevertheless, when my bird disappeared, I was still utterly stunned.

After all, humans are afraid of sudden change, the fear of the unknown, they say

Twitter is heading towards becoming an all-in-one app like WeChat, so transformation and changes are required.

Twitter is now X, the Western WeChat

I am amazed at how they are doing this now. Although, at first, there was this doubt. Now I expect success and changes that bring a big help.

Because WeChat is a useful handy app for businesses. It’s also like a part of your life, an app where you have all you need on your phone. But imagine a podcast on it as well, brilliant!

But seriously, why is it the letter X? There are lots of negative feedback on the new logo.

Why the letter X?

Though I feel that Musk just loves X, maybe? Because most of his project names had the letter X, or his son’s name that had an X on it.

CEO Linda Yaccarino said.

X is the future state of unlimited interactivity — centered in audio, video, messaging, payments/banking — creating a global marketplace for ideas, goods, services, and opportunities.

Not sure about this, but I think that Musk is really into the X letter. Like how I used to like the letter J, I even thought of changing my name so that it will start with a J.😅

Elon Musk on Twitter: "Not sure what subtle clues gave it way, but I like the letter X pic.twitter.com/nwB2tEfLr8 / Twitter"

Not sure what subtle clues gave it way, but I like the letter X pic.twitter.com/nwB2tEfLr8

Regardless of why it turned in the letter X, let’s check out this Everything App or the Supper App and its plans for it.

X, the Super App

Just after buying Twitter Inc., Musk mentioned something about “X, the Everything App” also called the Super App.

Previously, Musk revealed admiration for China’s WeChat owned by Tencent Holdings Ltd. He said he will add “comprehensive communications and the ability to conduct your entire financial world.”

It is now clear what he meant by that. A platform of all the platforms.

Imagine having Facebook, Twitter, Uber, Instagram, Substack, and shops in one place. X is a platform that hosts additional services and providers. That’s just amazing!

We will have to look forward to more changes starting today because there will be more.

I am also one of the fans of WeChat. All you need is there, entertainment, news, messaging, payments, and all. Maybe I am a bit biased, but I have always been into trying new things, trying the unknown.

Unknown will always be unknown without venture of discovery.

How will you know the unknown if you are scared? Scared until you’ve done it, aren’t you?

In all honesty, I admire Elon Musk because he is open to challenges, fearless of failure, and of how people view him or his insights. He does everything he thinks will be good and will make an impact on the world.

What Is X? I want my Blue Bird back! was originally published in New Writers Welcome on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

Do you agree that good food and good people make someone relax?

I’m used to being alone, and I enjoy being alone.

Whether I’m doing something or not, I feel comfortable, and that’s what I just needed.

There are also times when I need inspiration and other insights.

Therefore, it’s also good to have company. Other times I go out and meet people, or observe those around me.

I Needed to Go Out and Get Inspiration

I went out with friends who are much younger than me this week. They are my little sister’s close friends, and she’s 11 years younger than me. So it’s like, I am 6 years older compared to the oldest of her friends.

We tried this newly opened restaurant to have Samgyupsal but were only disappointed.

Their food is bland, although they offer unlimited side dishes. I think it’s the quantity without the quality of the dishes, not considering the taste. So, I thought, no wonder it’s cheap.

Then we decided to go to a coffee shop to mend our disappointed tummies.

It’s not bad, I tried my safe option, a cup of hot latte, and I can only compliment it. Despite the low price, it’s on par with the one at Starbucks, where we were supposed to go.

It was fun. Good coffee will always put me in a good mood.

I’ve been in love with it since I was a kid.

Like, an instant coffee and sugar will be the best combination.

Here, especially in the province and mountainous areas, instant coffee, sugar, and creamer are the most common. It’s not expensive and anyone can afford it.

There’s also this place where my maternal grandparents reside, they only drink Barako. I remember when my lolo was still healthy he processes the coffee beans they produce from their backyard. Today, they can only buy.

They are in a higher land or upland area where I can drink 5 cups or more coffee in a day.

Have you experienced having to taste your food differently when you are in other places?

Like say, when you go camping, visit your relatives in rural areas and it’s the same food you cook but does not taste the same? It tasted better 😋

It’s how coffee was for me, sometimes it also depends on who I am with.

Get an email whenever Devi Cadaeg publishes.

Devi here and I’m open for freelance business. You can contact me here at ✉️ devicadaeg@gmail.com.

Update on 9/2023

More of Me here 🔽

• Home - Write with Panda
• I Have Forgotten Loneliness, and You Can Too