Yapjaw: This Newsletter Always Goes For It On 4th Down
Slackjaw readers and patrons of comedy, my name is Adam Dietz and I am the editor of Slackjaw’s thrice-monthly newsletter Yapjaw. Each month, I will showcase the best and brightest humor on Slackjaw in addition to some other cool stuff from equally cool spots. Spooky szn (season) is nearly upon us, so get your goddamn gourds out and cue up one of the Friday the 13th sequels. Next month we’re doing an OOPS, ALL HALLOWEEN installment of the newsletter. It’ll be scary and funny, just like Scream! And ahh, don’t be surprised everyone’s favorite foul-mouthed doll makes an appearance. I’m talking about ya boi Chucky! Cancel culture keeps coming for the Chuck, but when you know doll Voodoo, it takes more than a few old Tweets to bring you down.
On this week’s edition of Yapjaw, we’re talking triplets, NYC, and karate. Want the goods? Keep reading!
Slackjaw’s Best In Show:
Why We Laid Off Two Of The Triplets by Andrew Rodwin
7 Things to Do During This Zoom Meeting Other Than Your Job by Laura Berlinsky-Schine
I’m The Slice of Pizza In Your Hands And No, I’m Not A Triangle by Mayur Chauhan
The Only Thing Strong Enough To Power Our Latest Software Update Is A Nuclear Reactor by Rowdy Geirsson
Are You Listening To A Morning Radio Show Or Driving Your Middle-Aged Parents Somewhere? by Kevin Binder
Great Work From Other Great Places:
What To Do With Dad’s Ashes When You’re Moving, And Dad Can’t Come by Lindsay Marie in The Belladonna Comedy
Welcome To Our Cul-De-Sac by Bobbie Armstrong & Madeline Goetz in McSweeney’s
N.Y.C. Has Changed In The Two Hours Since I Arrived by Lana Schwartz in The New Yorker
From The Slackjaw Editors’ Desk:
Introducing The Tragedy Flag: The First Ever Flag Made To Stay At Half-Staff by Adam Dietz in Slackjaw
Our Denim Jackets Are Hand-Destroyed To Look Like You Lead An Adventurous Life by Alex Baia in Slackjaw
I Really Wish I Hadn’t Opened My New Karate Dojo In The San Fernando Valley by Adam Dietz & Troy Doetch in Slackjaw
Editor’s Note:
Dear Adam,
Why do you get so mad when we lose on Sundays? We’ve been doing it your entire life?
-The Detroit Lions, Detroit, Michigan
Dear Detroit Lions,
I honestly don’t know. Following you has been one of the tragedies of my life. My father and I both watch you every Sunday and then feel sickened when you find new and excruciating ways to lose close games. I wish I could quit you, I’ve tried, but I know in my heart of hearts that I’ll never be able to. Someday, you’re going to put it all together and it’ll all be worthwhile, all the sadness and torturous Sundays. Or so I tell myself. Until then, I’ll watch, trying to remind myself that none of it matters. Even though whenever I settle in for one of your stupid games, very few things seem to matter more.
The Final Bell:
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Until the next edition of Yapjaw, take it easy.
