Is the bloom off the David Chang rose? I don’t know and I don’t care; as sad and superficial as my life is I am still not shallow enough that signs of an incipient backlash to the Momofuku empire are anything I might be concerned about. However, I am shallow enough to…

Code is over. Apps are over. Vine is over. Maybe the future is branded emoji keyboards? No? Shit. What am I supposed to distract myself from death with now? Oh, right, journalists dancing naked while Mark Zuckerberg throws pennies at them. Man, maybe the ’90s weren’t the dumbest decade.