All stories published by The Awl on September 20, 2011

All Stories published by The Awl on September 20, 2011

Sarah Miller in The Awl

Sep 20, 2011

Dear FBI Hottie Ali Soufan

September 15, 2011

Dear Mr. Soufan,

Choire Sicha in The Awl

Sep 20, 2011

Amazon’s Warehouse of Sadness and Horribleness

Have you read the story about the Amazon warehouse outside Allentown? You should! It’s not… good. In short, Amazon largely staffs that warehouse with temporary workers through an agency, dangling the prospect of being promoted to full-time…

The Awl

Sep 20, 2011

The Fascinating Art On Show At The California State Bar Convention

by Maria Bustillos and Philo Hagen

Choire Sicha in The Awl

Sep 20, 2011

Things to Buy at the Monaco Boat Show

We are a little obsessed with yachts, simply because they are floating piles of burning f-you…

Dave Bry in The Awl

Sep 20, 2011

Richard Dawkins Inspires Less Smart Man

The Awl

Sep 20, 2011

The Rogue, Undefeated, Reformed and Saved Sarah Palin

by Abe Sauer

Alex Balk in The Awl

Sep 20, 2011

People Who Get Up Early Are Better Than You

“[A] new study finds that people who get out of bed by 7 a.m., on average, do better in the workplace and have a lower chance of being depressed, stressed and overweight.” They also probably think life is worth living and stuff. Sigh. I’m going back to bed.

Alex Balk in The Awl

Sep 20, 2011

Switzerland’s Endless Cycle Of Guinea Pig Purchases

“Without her rent-a-guinea pig service, the owner would have to purchase a new, probably younger guinea pig as a companion to the ageing survivor, whose eventual death would force the purchase of yet another guinea pig, locking the owner…

Alex Balk in The Awl

Sep 20, 2011

I Believe The Children’s Teeth Are Our Future

The next time you see a smiling child, that symbol of innocence and potential and happiness in a world where none of those things ever come to any meaningful fruition, look closely at his or her teeth: They are full of stem cells. Expensive, valuable…

Dave Bry in The Awl

Sep 20, 2011

Snake Long

Alex Balk in The Awl

Sep 20, 2011

Bears Uncuddly

“Are bears really soft? Not compared to other mammals. Brown bears like Charmin’s Leonard do possess a thick pelt and an ample (though seasonal) layer of subcutaneous fat. Still, the softness of an animal is generally thought to depend upon the density and composition of its fur — and according to…

Choire Sicha in The Awl

Sep 20, 2011

‘Diner,’ The Musical, By Sheryl Crow

Uh, what? “Barry Levinson and Cheryl [sic] Crow have teamed on a stage musical based on Levinson’s 1982 pic ‘Diner,’ with the tuner aiming to land on Broadway in fall 2012. Levinson pens the book with Crow on board for the music and lyrics. Kathleen Marshall…

Choire Sicha in The Awl

Sep 20, 2011

Obama Setting Records on Deportation

“Obama is on the verge of deporting more undocumented immigrants in a single term than Bush did his full eight years in office.” Liberals. What can you do.

Alex Balk in The Awl

Sep 20, 2011

Chico Hamilton At 90

Alex Balk in The Awl

Sep 20, 2011

The Baby Penguin Who Nobody Wanted

Here is the heartwarming tale of a baby penguin who was abandoned by his relatives because he was bald, only to be welcomed back into bosom of family once his condition reversed itself and he was able to grow hair. The lesson, as always, is if you’re going to be different, you’re going to be alone.