My Wife Tells All About Her BDSM and Non-Con Fetishes
The kinky little bitch likes sex hard, deep, rough and with plenty of spanking, restraints and objectification.
Only a few weeks into our romance, I realized Lauren wasn’t like most other women with whom I’d had sex. She wanted to be fucked very hard and deeply, almost always in doggystyle position. She called me “daddy,” which kind of shocked me at first. Then came her desire for me to spank her during intercourse.
All of this may seem like a guy’s dream come true — a super-hot 23-year-old girlfriend wanting — actually needing — to be pounded, desiring sex daily, expressing herself as a super-kinky bitch. And it was and still is fun, though it took some time for me to really understand and embrace the fact that at the root of Lauren’s kinky desires was a BDSM fetish complete with non-consensual fantasies.
With that, below is a fun little Q&A with Lauren about her BDSM and non-con fetishes. Some of these questions and answers have already appeared here, but we’ve recently added additional content, and we made a point to not hold back — all for your enjoyment. Note: If you have a question that’s not covered below, drop it in the comments and I’ll see what I can do with a response.
Me: First things first. Do you have a BDSM fetish?
Lauren: I’m not crazy about labels — you know that. I think human sexuality can be complex. But, yeah, people have fetishes and, yeah, you could say I have a BDSM fetish. It’s mostly about dominance and submission, though. I’m definitely not into sadomasochism.
Me: I’d say you like very rough sex. Accurate?
Lauren: Yeah.
Me: When do you remember first having a desire for dom/sub sex?
Lauren: I’ve always been sexually submissive, even when I was a sexually active teenage girl and young adult. Then, in my early 20s, around when we met, I felt this growing desire to be dominated. It confused me. But I didn’t act on it until you.
Me: Why did it confuse you?
Lauren: Here I was desiring something that polite society shunned, that seemed at the time counter to what it meant to be a strong, independent woman. What I desired was to be sexually dominated and subjugated. I dated a few guys who had no clue what all of this meant.
Me: Did any of them get rough with you? By rough, I mean sexually dominating you.
Lauren: No. They had no clue how to handle my desires.
Me: So you told them what you wanted?
Lauren: A little, yeah. But I didn’t know yet how to express what I wanted. It was frustrating.
Me: Where do you think these desires came from?
Lauren: As you know, I had a wonderful childhood growing up in Sweden. My parents were and are amazing. My sister and I grew up in a healthy home where love and sexuality were embraced. As a teen, I masturbated and never felt any shame over it. I did, however, stay quiet about being bisexual for a long time before coming out about that and our lifestyle to my parents, my sister and some of our [non-swinger] friends.
Anyway, my sister and I have since learned that our parents had — maybe still have — quite a sex life. My sister once found some sex toys of theirs that indicated an interest in dom/sub and maybe some swinging. Then, a few years ago, my sister confided to me that she, too, enjoys being sexually dominated. Maybe it runs in the family?
Me: So is it a Swedish thing then?
Lauren: Attitudes toward the body and sex in Sweden are different than here in U.S. For example, like many women, I never wore a top at the beach even as a teenager. Swedish people tend to be more comfortable with their bodies and more sexually open, but I’ve never seen any literature that suggests there’s more BDSM in Sweden than here in U.S. or elsewhere.
Me: What’s BDSM like between women?
Lauren: By my very nature, I am sexually submissive but more so with you than with Piper. I can’t explain why.
Me: I’ve seen Piper fuck you with a strap-on dildo but I’ve never seen her spank you. To be fair, you’ve also fucked her with a strap-on. And she’s also fisted you, which is a pretty dominant sex act.
Lauren: Mmmm, yeah, that’s all really hot.
Me: What’s it like getting spanked during sex?
Lauren: I love it. Makes me feel like you’re in control. There are lots of pleasure sensors in that part of the body and getting spanked while we have intercourse only adds to the fun. A lot of women fantasize about getting spanked, you know?
Me: Did you get spanked as a kid?
Lauren: Never. My sister and I grew up in a very stable, happy family. She and I weren’t perfect by any stretch but there was never, ever any physical punishment.
Me: Can deep, hard sex be too rough for you?
Lauren: So long as I’m not getting injured, no. I want it as deep and hard as you can give it. If it’s anal sex, though, I do like the pace a bit slower.
Me: Over the years, I’ve called you everything from my slut, whore and bitch to my own little fuck toy and cum dumpster. Have I ever called you a name during rough sex that offended you?
Lauren: Never. I like them all, daddy :-). Now, if you called me a cunt, for example, I wouldn’t be okay with that. But if you said you wanted to pound my cunt, mmmmm, I like that.
Me: Okay, bitch, what’s wearing the ball gag like?
Lauren: Ha! It has holes in it, which allow me to breathe. If it didn’t have holes, not sure how I’d feel about it. When it’s in my mouth, I feel completely submissive to you. You own me. I love it. But it’s not for everyone. A lot of women would freak at the thought of wearing a ball gag.
Me: And yet you’re a feminist?
Lauren: Again, I’m not crazy about labels but, yeah, I’m a feminist. Being a feminist and wanting to be sexually dominated aren’t mutually exclusive, you know? Being a feminist means I have sexual agency and the confidence to say what I want, which is for you to sexually dominate me when I’m in the mood for that. And it means I have sexual agency to say what I don’t want.
Me: Does your BDSM fetish include rape fantasies?
Lauren: No. I would never desire to be raped. What I have are fantasies about being sexually dominated. I’m glad we can explore them together.
Me: Where’s your line in terms of what you won’t do?
Lauren: The line is where something makes me, you or us uncomfortable and where someone gets hurt. The video we shot a few years ago was fun for me but made you uncomfortable. I’ll admit it took my non-consensual fantasies to the extreme for sure. If someone who didn’t know us watched it, they may think something happened that really didn’t. It was intense. We’ve never again gone to that extreme and that’s okay. We crossed a line.
Me: We’ve watched that video a few times and it’s hard for me to view because, as you said, it appears to be something that it really isn’t.
Lauren: I think it’s hot but I see your point. It’s complicated.
Me: Do you enjoy sexual humiliation?
Lauren: That’s hard to answer because I’m not crazy about the word “humiliation.” The answer is, I occasionally enjoy being objectified and used by you.
Me: Examples of being objectified and used by me?
Lauren: How graphic should I get with my examples?
Me: This is for my readers. The more graphic you get, the better.
Lauren: Okay. Well, let me think…. If you ejaculate on my face and command that I rub it all over my face, that turns me on. If you say to me, “suck my dick, bitch,” I like that and will (most of the time). If during sex you say, “shut up, bitch,” that turns me on. I also like it when you spank and whip my ass, pull my hair, put me in handcuffs, hold me down and make me wear one of my chokers. Wearing the ball gag, too, really gets me hot. Make sense?
Me: Yeah, it does. So I’m guessing getting fucked by other guys — other husbands — is the ultimate form of objectification and being used?
Lauren: Yeah, to a point. There’s no love to it — just fucking because they find me hot.
Me: And golden showers? You seem to like those. A bit humiliating, no?
Lauren: So I happen to know several women in our lifestyle who enjoy those. Piper likes them, too. I’m not gonna say I’m in the mood for that all the time but occasionally it’s a turn-on, yeah.
Me: Speaking of golden showers, what’s it like squirting?
Lauren: To get me to squirt, you have to get really rough with my vagina with your fingers, which actually feels quite good. I just relax and let you do whatever it is you do on the upper wall of my vagina until finally it all comes gushing out. It feels pretty good and I love the feeling of the release.
Me: It’s probably just urine, you know?
Lauren: Maybe. Or maybe not.
Me: It’s super hot to watch you get that turned on and do that.
Lauren: I like it.
Me: Shifting gears….. Why do you like to call me daddy?
Lauren: First, that term has zero to do with my real father. Rather, it’s a term I like to use to establish you as dominant and me as your submissive partner. It’s similar to sir, master or boss. Make sense?
Me: Oh, yeah. Does throat-fucking ever hurt?
Lauren: Learning to deep-throat takes time and patience. Once that skill is mastered, it’s not too difficult to learn how to get throat-fucked and it actually be enjoyable. I like it when you do that to me. Makes me feel so submissive to you. But it requires a lot of trust.
Me: What’s it actually feel like having my dick go down your throat?
Lauren: Kind of like swallowing food. Just don’t cum down my throat. As you recall, we’ve tried that a few times and sometimes it can choke me. I much prefer you cum in my mouth over down my throat.
Me: You’re a kinky bitch.
Lauren: Yes, I am. Just admitting that is the most important part of exploring these fantasies. A lot of women have these fantasies and they keep them to themselves rather than open up about them.
Me: Best position for me to dominate you?
Lauren: Easy. Doggystyle.
Me: Why doggystyle?
Lauren: It allows hard and deep penetration. It allows for spanking, hair-pulling, anal play and whatever else you desire to make me your little bitch and fuck toy.
Me: I like that. So are you my little bitch?
Lauren: Oh yeah.
Me: Then tell our readers!
Lauren: Um, yeah, hi. So I’m his little bitch, his fuck toy, his slut, his sex slave and his cum dumpster — and you’re not. How’s that?
Me: Perfect, baby! A few more questions. Where does anal sex fit within your BDSM and non-con fetishes?
Lauren: It’s a very naughty thing to do. That orifice is really designed for things to exit, not go in. So when it’s penetrated, to me it just feels like you’re totally using me. Feels so good.
Me: So if you have multiple guys all having sex with you and all three orifices are being penetrated?
Lauren: So long as everyone is behaving, makes me feel totally used. It’s hot.
Me: And the anal plug?
Lauren: An anal plug isn’t for everyone but I love to have it in my ass while we have sex and even when I self-pleasure. Piper, too, is a huge anal plug fan. Double penetration is very hot and enjoyable.
Me: Thank you for telling all, baby.
Lauren: You’re welcome, daddy.
