List #25: 30 Things I am Proud of (Achieving) Before 30

30 Lists of 30 to Celebrate my 30th Birthday

8 min readAug 26, 2021

The What & Why Behind This Project:

This year I turn 30. And my gosh, I have been thinking about it a lot. I don’t know if it’s the pandemic, or the fact that this milestone is loaded with many societal expectations, but my mind has inundated me with reflections and memories from the past, with questions arising about my life choices and lesson learnt, about my expectations of being a human and about my desires for the future. And this combined with pandemic reflections has meant there has been a lot on my mind….🤔

I started writing a series of questions and lists of all the elements I wanted to capture and articulate. There were a lot, unsurprisingly; 30 years is a long time really! So I gave up on the 1 list idea that I normally write (30 reflections/lessons turning 30) and decided to write 30 lists.

30 Lists of 30, for my 30th Birthday.

Who are these lists for, you might wonder? I started writing reflections many years ago to get to know myself better. And when I shared these raw and real accounts with friends I discovered that what I wrote about my individual journey, touched upon something universally human. Beyond the masks and labels we wear is a messy, beautifully complex life, with highs and lows. And more similar to others than we might think.

So I share them in the hope that you too might feel something — intrigue, joy, resonance or maybe even difference — as you reflect on what it means to be a human. I recognise that my experiences are my own, that some come from a place of privilege and that they may not all be relatable or interesting to you. I know I can’t please everyone, so take what you can…(and let me know what lands!).

So, Back to Lists…

The Why Behind List #24: 30 Things I am Proud of (Achieving) Before 30

Pride is such a beautiful yet challenging emotion. Culturally, we are told to stop and look at the view and how far we have come and yet also not talk about our achievements lest we seem boastful. The more (personal development) work I do on myself and with my clients, the more I realise how damaging it is to not have the space to express and celebrate what we have achieved. We end up in trapped in cycles of striving — chasing the feeling of success that will validate our worth, value or ‘enoughness’. This list is one step in the direction of breaking the striving cycle.

List #24: 30 Things I am Proud of (Achieving) Before 30

Taking the opportunities life has given me to experience the richness of life — both the joyful moments as well as the deep and dark challenges. One of my intentions for 2019 was to live aligned to this quote: ‘And at the end of the day, your feet should be dirty, your hair messy and your eyes sparkling.”― Shanti.
Becoming a dancer. This is something I was craving for years and didn’t let myself commit to doing until I designed a creative challenge for myself in 2017, which involved doing a new creative activity every month. After 4 weeks of classes, I was addicted! I have been learning Brazilian Zouk for a few years now, practicing in both the UK and at international congresses and 24hr dance marathons! I’m still very much an intermediate dancer and could do with some refining of my technique. But I’m proud to have showed up to multiple socials and workshops and asked advanced lead dancers to dance with me even when I sucked and when my imposter syndrome was seriously high!
Finishing the London 2012 Marathon in sub-4 hours (just!) and an ultra-marathon (54 miles — The 2012 Caledonian Challenge, Scotland) in c.16hrs with a team. Both taught me how you can still choose to carry on when the pain hits, the power of social accountability and psychologically how much it helps to only think about the milestone (e.g. 7 miles away to milestone 4, rather than another 30 miles to go!).
Becoming a community builder in all parts of my life. I really believe that this (non-formal) role is one of the most important and easy ways you can add value to everyone’s lives.
Holding myself accountable to create my ideas in reality — following my desire to learn how to engineer more meaningful conversations. I created my company Trigger Conversations in 2016 from just 1 event of 21 humans to now over 150+ events, workshops & programmes with my team of 6 trained hosts, bringing together 1700+ humans (Trigger community, universities, businesses, charities, communities, networks) together for 6000+ meaningful conversations.
Spending my 20s focusing on personal development: I’ve spent much of the past decade following my curiosity and exploring what it means to be human; deeply relating and becoming aware of myself and learning to read, influence and manage my relationships with others. This including completing a 10-day Vipassana (silent meditation retreat) in 2019.
Asking for help when I was being bullied and seriously unhappy at school. If only I had done it sooner.
Applying for and delivering my TEDx in 2018 ‘Talking to Strangers: How to Have a Meaningful Conversation’, one of my key milestones to complete this decade.
Getting a distinction for my MSc despite challenges circumstances at the time of writing my thesis (significant relationship break-up and my final foot surgery).
Designing and taking ownership of all my roles at the Universities Officer Training Corps (UOTC), especially as the Adventurous Training and Sports Coordinator, which led to me winning a few awards. Learning on the job, I designed, coordinated and managed overseas expeditions, an inter-unit sports competition, built curriculum and discovered training opportunities for everyone in the unit to attend throughout the year.
Making time and getting involved in all things extra-curricular at school — acting in school plays, playing in music competitions, cross-country running team, training with the Combined Cadet Force (CCF) for 4 years, a Sacristan in chapel, Shakespeare Society, karate even though I struggled learning the katas, debating team (which was terrifying), travel competition applications, the Malawi fundraising team, prefect duties etc.
Investing (time, energy and emotion) in relationships, a large part of what makes life fulfilling and meaningful.
Being truthful even when hard — giving feedback to others, sharing my boundaries and saying no, owning my mistakes and the behaviours that negatively impact others.
Learning to have compassion, understanding and love for all the parts of me (see list #21) — even the shadow parts I dislike and not just the GSD (get stuff done) productive Georgie!
Becoming a good coach, facilitator, speaker and trainer through saying yes to opportunities to practice in the ‘arena’, soliciting feedback and acting on it, and embracing an experimental mindset to learning.
Living by the quote ‘nothing ventured, nothing gained’. Consistently showing up to and leaning into discomfort as the way into growth.
Giving what I can when I can. I try to help people whenever I can, even when it feels like I have little to give. This includes something as simple as smiling or treating strangers (shopkeepers, the homeless, people in queues) like humans, connecting people, sharing opportunities across networks, sharing my appreciation for and the impact others have on me.
Committing my time on this earth to something that delivers a positive social impact.
Saying yes to a hell of a lot with no idea whether it is the ‘right’ thing, being open to the wonderful randomness and serendipity in life.
Believing that I could be well and healthy again and then healing myself. I searched extensively for alternative health methods and tried many of them after the classic route led nowhere. I’m proud that I didn’t ever give up and slowly managed to nurse my body back to health (twice) following a lot of fatigue (plus other challenges).
Becoming a writer in public, by just starting. Leaning into the vulnerability of sharing my personal experiences of being human on Facebook, Medium, Conversations with Georgie and in this project.
Learning how to be and not to be a leader by becoming one — stepping up as a leader at every stage of my life, learning to bring people together, getting it wrong and learning what not to do as well.
Asking for honest feedback from others. Learning that others’ experiences of me are their lived experience and true for them. Sitting with and being curious about the feedback even when I want to defend myself, , noticing but not reacting to my triggers, learning that it doesn’t make me ‘not enough’.
Asking people questions that let them explore their own map of the world (and not assuming theirs is like mine) and letting them find their own solutions (and not giving them mine).
Becoming addicted to reading and learning (and buying books!).
Applying for and receiving a place at Imperial College to do a PhD in Human Connectivity Design at the School of Design Engineering (starts in Oct 2021). After my MSc I knew I wanted to do a PhD but wasn’t sure of the exact research topic. 6 years later I have found it and I’m proud to be prioritizing this now.
Getting onto the front page of the Times Newspaper and a variety of national and international news outlets (Time Magazine, Entrepreneur Magazine, Huffington Post, The Telegraph, Daily Mail, City AM, NBC News, The Independent etc.)
Feeling grateful for and telling the people who influenced my life about it (still ongoing as there are so many but I’m getting there!)
Identifying my values and making major life decisions according to them, not other people’s or societies. This includes turning down jobs that don’t give me the independence I need to take charge of my own learning or impact.
Letting myself become a teacher, something I have always loved doing since I was a child.

☕ If you enjoyed reading this list and want to support my writing I would love a coffee!

👉 https://www.buymeacoffee.com/30Listsof30 👈

Your support will help me fund my PhD starting in October 2021 at the School of Design Engineering, Imperial College, London. The subject: Human Connection & Conversation Design. This research lab > interactionfoundry.com

Want To Read More Lists?

I’m publishing one list every day in August (and will add the hyperlinks below).

List #25: 30 Things I am Proud of (Achieving) Before 30

30 Lists of 30 to Celebrate my 30th Birthday

The What & Why Behind This Project:

So, Back to Lists…

List #24: 30 Things I am Proud of (Achieving) Before 30

Written by Georgie Nightingall